25 Conversation Starters For Your First Date

25 Conversation Starters For Your First Date:
Your Handy List

Going on a date soon? Worried about awkward silences? Don’t worry, I got you. Whether you’re going on an exciting first date or arranging an evening out with your long-term partner, finding common ground or enough to talk about which isn’t mundane or inappropriate can be a challenge.  In this feature I will provide a handy list of 25 conversation starters for your first date -which you could also use to get to know your long-term partner better if you’re already in a relationship.

Preparation To Ease First Date Nerves

First dates are nerve-wracking, no doubt about it. Will you like each other and will you be compatible, as well as being attracted to one another? Do your expectations for this date and the future match up? As well as these worries, you may be anxious about finding enough to talk about throughout the date. An easy way out of this is to take your date to see a movie at the cinema, where the focus is on watching the film rather than chatting with each other. However, this simply delays the important factor of getting to know one another properly, which can only happen through communication -as daunting as it may seem.

Some of these conversation starters for your first date may seem a little obvious or a little ‘safe’. If you’ve ever been for a job interview, taken your driving test or been in a similar high-stress situation, you’ll know just how quickly your mind goes completely blank. And safe topics are definitely the best place to begin when talking to someone you don’t yet know all that intimately. Finding out their views, preferences and life goals will help the conversation develop to deeper levels as you get to know them properly.

25 First Date Conversation Starters

Many of my first date conversation starters are question-based, because at this stage you don’t know each other very well, so you don’t know exactly what you’ve got in common. First dates are usually a blend of flirting, enjoying your chosen activity and fact-finding about the other person so you can deduce how compatible you are in various life aspects, as well as shared interests.

Keep this list of handy conversation starters for your first date on a note app on your phone, then when you slip to the loo before and during your date you’ll have instant and easy access to dating chat inspiration:

1. 1. 1. 1. Music: What’s your favourite type of music? Favourite band?
         2. TV & Film: Which TV series do you love, and what are your favourite films?
         3. Comedy: Who are your favourite comedians? What sort of comedy do you love/dislike?
         4. Space travel: Would you want to go into space/to the moon/move to Mars? Do you think aliens exist?
         5. Hobbies: Do you have any hobbies? How did you get into them?
         6. The past: What’s your best childhood memory?
         7. Fears: Do you have any fears or phobias? How do you think they started?
         8. Travel: Do you like travelling? Where have you been and which place was your favourite? Which places are left on your travel bucket list?
         9. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be -and why?
         10. What’s your preferred way to travel? Rail, sea or air?
         11. Dreams: First 5 things you’d do if you won the Big One on the lottery?
         12. Employment: Which was your best (& worst) ever job? What’s your dream job?
         13. Do you have any tattoos or body piercings?
         14. Are you into video or tabletop games? If so, what are your favourites?
         15. Leisure time: What’s your favourite way to spend a Friday night? What do you normally do over the weekend?
         16. Sports: Are you into sports? Which ones and which teams do you support?
         17. Fitness: Are you into personal fitness? What sort of exercise do you enjoy most?
         18. Family: Do your family live close by? Do you have any siblings? Are you the eldest, youngest or in the middle?
         19. Books: Do you like reading? What are your favourite books & favourite author?
         20. Weather: Are you a hot weather or cold weather person?
         21. What’s your favourite colour and why?
         22. Animals: What’s your favourite animal? Do you/have you had any pets?
         23. Health: Have you got any allergies?
         24. Food: Do you enjoy cooking? What are your favourite foods? Is there anything you’ve never tried but really want to?
         25. If you could spread one piece of advice around the world, what would it be?

Avoid…

Judge the atmosphere accordingly of course, but there are some topics which are generally off limits when it comes to first date chat. My advice is to avoid talking about:

• Past relationships
• Money
• Marriage and children aspirations (unless you’re directly asked about your hopes, and you don’t mind sharing)
• Oversharing regarding your sexual preferences (unless they specifically ask, and you’re happy to share)
• Oversharing regarding your kinks (unless this is the basis for your date, obviously)

With regards political and religious views, the traditional advice is to avoid these topics with people you don’t know very well. However, if you feel you can politely navigate these conversational waters, it is a good idea to identify from the outset whether your persuasions and beliefs in these areas are aligned – or totally at odds.

Dating Communication Tips

Remember that as well as talking and asking gently probing questions, you should listen properly to the answers, genuinely interested in finding out more about the person you’re dating. Ask because you genuinely want to know, don’t ask simply to fill the silence.

Another important note: Try not to fire off question after question at the person, as if the first date is a job interview and they’re vying for position as your romantic partner. The conversation starters listed in this article should be just that: the start of a conversation. They are intended as helpful boosts to the communication between you on your date, not the entire focus or content.

I hope this feature has given you the reassurance to head out on your first date feeling prepared and confident there won’t be any awkward silences.  Congratulations on your date – I wish you nothing but success and happiness!

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