Cara Sutra Sex Blog

Sex advice, pleasure guides, erotic stories and intimacy insights - all in one place.

Welcome to my main blog hub on Cara Sutra. This is where my guides, personal essays, relationship reflections, sex advice, erotic fiction, kink-aware discussions and behind-the-scenes posts all live together, in date order. If you landed here from search and you are looking for real-world, sex positive writing that does not talk down to you, you are in the right place. This archive brings together decades of writing across sexuality, relationships, pleasure and personal experience, with hundreds of articles spanning sex, intimacy and real-life experience.

Sex Advice, Pleasure Guides and Real-Life Intimacy

This category gathers my non-review content across sexuality, confidence, communication and connection. Some posts are practical and straight to the point, others are personal and reflective, and some are sensual and story-led. The goal is the same: to help you explore pleasure and intimacy in a way that feels safe, informed, and actually doable in real life.

What You Can Expect From the Cara Sutra Blog

  • Practical sex advice and how-to guides you can use without needing a handbook and a spotlight
  • Pleasure education grounded in anatomy, consent and real experience, not judgement or performance
  • Intimacy and relationship insights - communication, desire shifts, libido wobbles, and everything in between
  • Kink-aware, consent-forward discussions that keep emotional safety in the frame
  • Sensual and erotic stories exploring fantasy, desire and emotional intimacy
  • Personal essays and honest life updates when the story behind the advice matters

Where To Start

Not sure what you are after yet? Here are a few simple ways to explore.

  • For practical help, look for guide-style posts with clear steps and takeaways
  • Personal essays and relationship reflections are a good place to begin when you want connection or reassurance
  • Curious about kink? Start with posts focused on consent, communication, power dynamics and emotional aftercare
  • Prefer to explore freely? Scroll and follow whatever catches your attention - there are plenty of rabbit holes here

My Approach

I write from lived experience, with warmth and straight talk, and I don't pretend sex is one-size-fits-all. Bodies vary. Histories vary. Energy, confidence, hormones, disability, stress, trauma, ageing, parenting, identity - it all shows up in intimacy, whether we want it to or not.

This blog focuses on the real version of sexuality, not the polished one.

Featured Topics

Browse sex advice, pleasure guides, erotic stories and relationship topics to jump straight to what interests you most.


Scroll down to read the latest posts from the Cara Sutra blog and discover new ideas, insights and intimate conversations.

The Most Powerful Vibrators You Can Buy

Happy National Orgasm Day 2018! It's difficult to believe it's been a year already since the last National Orgasm Day – the year has just flown. In the past I've written about the sounds of an orgasm, the importance (or not) of simultaneous orgasms, about not being able to orgasm through oral sex and about having orgasms while I'm asleep. As many of my orgasms are helped along a little bit (OK, a lot) by sex toys, today I want to discuss some of my favourites. The toys which are, for me, the best powerful vibrators for extra strong orgasms.

Legend Of The Seeker Mord-Sith Cara Red Leather Cosplay Outfit

A mord-sith is a member of a warrior group in the Sword Of Truth series. They're all women, and are trained to become mord-sith from when they're young girls. They are captured from their family in order to go through brutal training to attain the title and role of mord-sith.

My Favourite Sex Positions

Are there some sex positions you find yourself 'coming' back to time after time? My partner and I definitely have our favourite sex positions, and in the past I’ve worried that we might be getting stuck in a rut. A rut that, admittedly, feels so good. But then when I went through the sex positions we enjoy on a regular basis, it turns out we enjoy more variety than I’d feared.

Bound To Serve As A Sex Slave

Denna's voice, however, laced with cruelty-tinged, lusty potential, was having the desired effect on him. By now, his locked chastity device was performing quite an impressive dance as the months-denied cock beneath strained for release, and relief.

Bundled Into The Gang Bang Van

Once again, I gave silent thanks for the almost total darkness which covered my flush of humiliation. The sensation of my own cursed wetness smearing and being pulled tightly over my clit and cunt lips, then between my arse cheeks, was almost enough to make me beg for a rough hard fucking. I didn't even care which hole any more. Cunt, arse, either. Both.  

What Is FemDom? Exploring Female Domination in BDSM

What is FemDom? Some would say it's the Marmite of the BDSM scene. Is it the BDSM outsider? Female Domination usually elicits a response firmly on one end of the scale or the other: yes please! or ...um, no thanks.

The Masturbatrix

Her last orgasm had been less than 15 minutes ago, and from the way her breasts were rising and falling, the breaths drawn raggedly through her nostrils, it wouldn't be long before she'd surrender to another. Her eyelids would flutter, eyes behind enjoying the views and sensations of strangely recurrent dreams, her mind in another world – completely unaware of reality.

Finally, Some Time Alone

I felt my clit tingle beneath my skinny jeans, under the lace of my G-string. Suddenly I was hyper aware of my breasts, the hardening of my nipples, and the fact that my pussy lips felt like they wanted to part, begging to be filled and pleasured.

Hood Ornament

Everything about me loathed this, hated that it was happening. Everything about me, that is, apart from my traitorous pussy which obediently and happily produced lubrication for his urgently penetrating member. The fact I was restrained, unable to do anything but comply, plus the loud urging from the audience meant he blew his hot load deep inside my cunt before too long.  

Dacryphilia: Why Tears and Crying Can Be Sexy

As the barrier crashes down within him, crumbling to reveal his true self, tears then finally begin to form. I see the subtlest glint and can't help wetting my own lips with my tongue in anticipation –in between my incessant tirade, the code to unlock his complete submissive self.  

Small Butt Plugs For Beginners & Tight Arses

I've written plenty of beginner's guides to anal toys and butt plugs in the past, and you can find plenty of sex toy advice throughout the Cara Sutra sex blog. Today, however, I wanted to present what I feel are the true top picks when it comes to easily insertable (yet still body safe) small butt plugs for tiny bums.

Coming Full Circle

The spotlight centred on my naked, kneeling body is bright enough to just reveal the dark forms stood in a circle surrounding me. I feel the men's presence, rather than see them; I'm seeing the scene through my mind's eye in any case, with my eyes squeezed tightly closed, blocking out reality, even while it commands my full sensory attention. 

A New Flavour

"Shy" was not how I'd describe her. A mischievous gleam swirled like an undiscovered cosmos in her dark eyes, while her full red lips seemed determined to settle into a cheeky pout whenever they weren't getting her into trouble.  
Big Guide To Magic Wand Vibrators and Our Magic Wand Vibrator Reviews

Wand Vibrators Guide

What’s the absolute best wand vibrator? Which is the most powerful wand vibrator? If you’re looking for a mighty toy which can deliver unforgettable orgasms, then sex toy connoisseurs know to head straight for the magic wand vibrators.

Caught In The Act

Then we're connected. The warm tip of his erection presses against my puckered, lube-slicked hole, expertly seeking its sheath as his hands remain holding me spread. Thanks to his thoughtful, teasing preparation, the head of his cock slips inside. I feel, rather than hear, him groan above me as he fights against instant self-indulgence and forces himself to take time over his conquest.  

Can You Be Just Friends With An Ex?

Whether the ex was a regular booty call or a long-term partner in a relationship, many of us have people we've been emotionally and physically intimate with in the past. This prior closeness engenders strong emotion, and they say love and hate are two sides of the same coin. Are you friends with any of your exes? Is it even possible? Can you ever be just friends with an ex?  

Slipping In While I’m Asleep And Fucking Me Awake

Index and middle finger expertly sought out the slippery wetness his attentions had generated so far. My breaths turned ragged and heavy as he slid a finger inside me, probing and testing, then another... opening me up and finger fucking me. My nipples were hard against the covers and his other arm slipped round underneath me, seeking the weight of my breasts to complete the sinful encircling.  

The Wedding: What’s Yours Is Mine

The whispers of those seated at the back were muffled by the whoops surrounding the drawn-out kiss of joy at the altar, until a natural settling revealed the click-clack of my heels on the stone. A wave of anxious whispers and angry mutters accompanied my approach to the still lost-in-each-other bride and groom, which turned to gasps of shock as I undid and threw off the hideous overcoat without breaking stride. 

The Hotness Of Gay Sex

There’s something about man loving and gay sex which gets my knickers twitching. It doesn’t even have to be all-out gay porn; just a simple act of romantic affection between guys on a TV show can catch my clit’s interest. When it does come down to the action, though, man-on-man sex scenes are so fucking hot...

Can You Make Your Own Sex Toys At Home?

When the budget's stretched thin it's sensible to cut costs by cutting out luxuries. And I'd wager that most people view sex toys as a luxury. With the popularity of crafting, plus incentives to be eco-friendly wherever possible, it could be tempting to try and make your own sex toys at home.