Coronavirus & My Sex Life: How COVID-19 Killed My Libido
2020. Year of dashed hopes, ruined plans, social distancing, covered faces, stress and anxiety – plus a renewed appreciation for the NHS and all keyworkers. How did you spend the COVID-19 lockdown? Did you use the time to slow down, listen to your needs, learn a new language, reach your peak of physical fitness, begin a new hobby or craft? ...me neither. I don't know anyone who did, to be honest.
My Sobriety: Choosing the Sober Life When You’re Not an Alcoholic
Now I’ve leapt off the booze merry-go-round, I see alcohol for what it really is, in the stark and sober light of day.
My Positive Mirena Coil Insertion Story: How It Felt & Life With An IUD
So here it is: my Mirena Coil insertion experience, plus what happens afterwards. As with all things, your mileage may vary – but as I often find it helpful to read ‘real person’ experiences online, I wanted to share my Mirena story. I hope it enlightens you about this particular intrauterine device, how it’s inserted, what to expect, potential side effects; and that it helps you decide whether the Mirena is the right choice for you.
Living with Low Libido: Where I Am Right Now
If you’re expecting an advice post, or a triumphant “problem solved!” write-up, you’re going to be disappointed. I’m right in the middle of this frustrating situation, and right now, there’s no light at the end of the tunnel. I’ve taken all my own advice about increasing your sex drive, followed all the usual sex tips. Nothing is working.
Aftercare After Sex: How to Reconnect, Recover and Deepen Intimacy
Sexual aftercare has taught me that the intimacy doesn’t end when the physical pleasure does. It is carried through in how we look after each other once our bodies physically separate and the lusty arousal fades. The mutual care that comes after the eroticism is where the true strength of our relationship resides.
From FitBit to Visible: Learning to Live with M.E.
It truly is devastating. Life looked a certain way, before; bright, active, hopeful. Now, life is darker, restricted, depressing. I’ve gone from running a busy life juggling motherhood, my relationship, my sex life, my hormones in perimenopause, my fulltime self-employment and my exercise and fitness goals, to a needle-scratch moment of life where the record was changed without warning or consent to an ominously slower pace. Of course I’m upset. Wouldn’t you be?
Welcome To My Midlife Rebellion
This piece is the introduction to a sub-category of my Life Unscripted series of personal reflections here at CaraSutra, a category I’m calling The Midlife Rebellion: Ageing, Body & Womanhood. In the immortal and only slightly edited words of Bon Jovi, “It’s my midlife”. But whose rebellion is it? Mine or my body’s? Or is it both? Let’s find out together. Welcome to my midlife rebellion.
Being deaf: High-Frequency Hearing Loss & Me
I’m not sure how may of my readers know this, but I’m deaf. Not 100% deaf, but certainly enough deafness that it impacts my everyday life.
Allowing Sadness Without Guilt
On reflection, I felt a lot of pressure to conform to fake happiness when I was a child - a girl child, Gen X, raised by boomer parents in a small community on a...
Parenting in a Neurodivergent Household: A Mother’s Reflection
Parenting is different for everyone, but what most parents agree on is that it isn't easy. The practical and emotional challenges shift through the years as you raise a child from newborn needs to independent adulthood and, one day, watch them fly the nest. That’s how it usually goes, anyway. But when you're raising neurodivergent children, all the usual expectations have to be let go.
How I’m Protecting My Energy In 2026
Since developing M.E. last year and learning how to navigate life with chronic illness on top of perimenopause and being deaf, my energy is a precious and carefully guarded resource. In 2026, protecting my energy isn’t a soundbite for trendy mindful culture. It’s mandatory, non-negotiable; the only way I will manage, survive and heal. This year, I am being intentional about what I give my time, attention and body to, and just as intentional about what I’ll no longer engage with.
Trusting That I’m Loved When I Struggle to Love Myself
Postponing love until some day which never actually comes is learnt self-cruelty. I’m rejecting self-cruelty and embracing self-kindness. How will I go about fully believing in his love for me? I don’t have all the answers, but I know I have to do the work dismantling my old belief systems.
My Nexplanon Implant Experiences: The Subdermal Contraceptive
What is the Nexplanon implant? How does it work? Does it hurt to get it inserted? How long does it last? Does it protect against STIs? Today I’m sharing my answers to all these questions, plus my personal experiences getting the Nexplanon subdermal contraceptive inserted...
Why I’m Writing a Survivor’s Journal
It’s important to me to tell my own story in my own words, rather than continuing to be psychologically affected by other people’s versions of my lived reality. Fighting against past gaslighting which echoes around my psyche is a daily battle. I’m no longer willing to minimise, distract from or ignore my experiences for my own or other people’s comfort. It’s my life, no-one else’s.
2025 Reflections: A Change Of Pace
The past 12 months have crawled by in a blink. That’s how this year has felt to me, in many ways; my personal pace downshifting a couple of gears while life rushes on around me with the same frenzied impatience as always. Every December I like to look back over the year and share some personal insights, what’s been going on behind the scenes, as it were. Most of my blog has been focused on adult toy reviews and sex advice, but today I’m carving out a little space for my 2025 reflections.
Parenting as a Survivor: Breaking Cycles Without Breaking Myself
I have a complicated past, with life experiences spanning childhood trauma, abusive relationships and more, all of it part of what makes me, me. Today I am going to talk about parenting as a survivor. How has my turbulent, traumatic past affected how I parent my children? Am I really the cycle-breaker I like to believe I am?
Why I Love Winter: A Slower Rhythm, Darkness, and the Permission to Rest
I enjoy winter as a natural pause, a time for clarity and introspective focus. This transitional period is a great annual opportunity to properly consider what I’d like to work on, what my plans are and how I’ll move forwards into literal and metaphorical spring.
Winter lets my feelings exist exactly as they are, and that authenticity is perfectly aligned with my core values.
New Year Weight Loss Plans? Why I’m Choosing Nourishment Over Diets This January
New year weight loss plans are everywhere you turn in January, berating you for the pleasurable excess you enjoyed in December. Every year, as the wheel turns and we move from party to punishment season, I feel the same harsh judgement about eating habits and body image, and hear the cutting voice of my inner critic, shaped over a lifetime by family, media, and cultural pressure. Happy new year: your body is once again up for review.
Learning Safety After a Lifetime of Survival
Did you feel safe when you were a child? Can you remember the first time you were properly scared? I ask with genuine curiosity, because for as long as I can remember, even through childhood, I lived under an ominous cloud of fear.
Writing With a Spine
I may not have a spine on the bookshelf, but I've got one in my body. And I'm freshly committed to writing with a backbone. Wherever my writing is published.
