Gay Sex Toys Guide: Adult Toys for Gay Lovers & Lesbian Couples

Gay Sex Toys Guide: Adult Toys for Gay Lovers & Lesbian Couples

It’s Pride Month! 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️ Did you catch my recent feature discussing the importance of LGBTQIA+ Pride Month? In addition to the activism and celebration side of Pride, this is also the perfect time to examine adult products which may hold a special allure for gay lovers & lesbian couples. So much in this world is still heteronormative, with the LGBTQIA+ community almost an afterthought or an add-on – which unfortunately often includes the categorised aisles in sex shops. Love is love, and it deserves to be fully celebrated in all its forms. Read on to discover my gay sex toys guide, where I’ll be showcasing adult toys ideal for gay couples, to enhance your intimate and passionate private time together.

When reading this guide, it is important to remember that:

Sex toys are made for anatomy, not gender or sexuality

The general rule is, if a sex toy is body safe and feels good to you, go for it! Adult products don’t care about your sexuality or gender, they are made to stimulate or enhance the pleasure felt by various parts of the human anatomy.

That said, there are sex toys which will hold greater appeal to gay men or women rather than heterosexual. Meanwhile, other sex toys have been designed primarily with hetero couples in mind, for example C-shaped vibrators and certain vibrating cock rings to be used during PiV (penis-in-vagina) sex.

The purpose of this gay sex toys guide is to offer some product inspiration for people in a gay or lesbian relationship. I’m not being mean and excluding single gay guys or lesbian girls; as I mentioned previously, sex toys are made to stimulate anatomy. Therefore, if you’re using an adult product by yourself, you simply need to search for sex toys designed to pleasure your particular body parts.

Sex Toys for Gay Lovers

Penis Enhancement

Cock Rings

There are plenty of penis enhancing and pleasure maximising benefits to using a cock ring.

Cock rings are worn around either the base of the penis shaft or around both the base of the penis and the testicles. The snug fit retains blood in your erection which causes it to become, and stay, engorged. As a result, you have a more prominent, larger-looking, longer-lasting and sensitive erection which lasts longer during sex.

Oxballs are a reliable brand for durable, effective cock rings; they start at just £6.99 from gay sex toys shop Clonezone.

Penis Extensions

Many people with a penis would love to experiment with a longer length, and penis extensions are an easy way to turn this fantasy into reality during sex. Penis extensions are made from soft, comfortable and flexible material, worn over your erection to provide you with several inches additional length.

Vixen products are beautifully crafted, with real-feel, flexible materials. You can find an array of realistic colour Vixen penis extensions at SheVibe, as well as many other types of penis extension – some in unusual colours and fantastical, non-penis designs.

Anal Stimulation

Anal Beads

Anal beads feel delightful on the way in, but spectacular on the way out! These graduated in size beads are finished with a loop or handle on the end for easy and fast retrieval. Slid out at the point of orgasm, the resulting sensation is unbelievably mind-blowing.

COLT have been creating & providing high-quality men’s and gay sex toys since the 1980s. They have honed their stimulation crafts to a fine art. These COLT Power Drill Balls are a fine example of this; each graduated bead is ribbed for maximum stimulation on the way in or out. There’s an easy retrieval loop at the end, and the toy is made from body-safe, flexible material favourite: silicone.

Vibrating Prostate Massagers

Have you dabbled with P-spot play yet? People with a penis have this walnut-shaped gland about 2-3 inches inside the anal canal. It can be tricky to find, and stimulate, with fingers – luckily there are many effective prostate massagers to make it much easier and which lead to powerful orgasms.

We have many prostate massager reviews here on the Cara Sutra sex blog, as well as a handy guide to prostate massage by an expert.

Some of the best quality and most effective prostate massagers available are made by Nexus Range. The Nexus Revo Slim received full marks in a review by a Cara Sutra community member, and you can shop the Nexus prostate massager toys at Clonezone.

Accessories

Anal Douche

Using an anal douche before anal sex will mean you haven’t got any nasty mess worries while you’re enjoying intimate fun with your partner.

Anal douches are simple in construction and easy to understand & use. There is usually a bulb part, and a nozzle part. They are either already together, or screwed together before use. Fill the bulb with warm water, then insert the nozzle anally to use the water in the bulb to swish around and flush out the anal cavity.

Using an anal douche before anal play and anal sex will lead to a worry-free playtime where you and your partner can focus on the pleasure, rather than fretting about any mess or embarrassment.

Find the Nexus Anal Douche & other great Nexus accessories over at gay sex toys shop Clonezone.

Lubricant

For anal sex, lubricant is a must. Anal-specific lubes are thicker than standard water-based or silicone types, while some are opaque so it’s easy to see exactly how much you’re using and where. I recommend the Mister B Lube – Thick.

Love a bit of mutual masturbation? Silicone lubricant provides slick glide which doesn’t dry out. If you’re worried about staining your sheets then stick to water-based, but silicone is the longest lasting so you can enjoy passionate play with your lover without interruption.

Get more information in my complete guide to sex lubes, as well as related specific guides: anal lubes, water-based lubes & silicone lubes.

Get kinky with:

Penis Chastity Cages

Heighten erotic tension by controlling when they are able to pleasure their cock, using a penis chastity cage. Or perhaps you are the one who would love your partner to lock you up and cruelly dictate when you’re allowed to wank, be sucked or fuck.

There are many different types of chastity cage available; various sizes, materials (metal, plastic silicone) and locking types (padlock & key, plastic numbered tags).

One of my favourite chastity shops is Oxy-Shop.com, who offer a fantastic array of chastity cages and other accessories. There are standard chastity cages but also the option for custom-made. There’s even a chastity size calculator so you’re sure you’re investing your cash in the right product before you purchase.

Inflatable/Locking Butt Plugs

An exciting and kinky addition to a sex session, inflatable and locking butt plugs add an alluring power element to your love life.

Hand over control of the anal toy to your eager partner, who will thoroughly enjoy your reactions as they gradually increase the size of the plug inside you. Or take control of their arse with a lockable butt plug – some of the lockable anal toys also expand inside the wearer for an almost overwhelming combination of mental and physical stimulation.

Swell is a brand which provides inflatable, insertable sex toys which are brilliant quality and orgasmically effective. Check them out and buy your favourite over at SheVibe.

You can find a great selection of extremely kinky locking butt plugs over at Oxy-Shop.com.

Sex Toys for Lesbian Couples

Strap-On Sex

Harnesses, Dildos & Accessories

If you’re in a lesbian couple that enjoys strap-on sex, there are plenty of harnesses, strap-on underwear, compatible dildos and bump bases to choose from.

The traditional method of strap-on sex is a harness into which an O-ring compatible base dildo can be affixed, forming a wearable toy to thrust into your partner. You can find out more in my guide to strap-on sex harnesses, as well as my guide to strap-on sex dildos.

Instead of the strappy styles of traditional strap-on harnesses, many people opt for the ease and comfort of strap-on jock or boxers underwear – such as the best-selling, highly rated Wet for Her Jock Harness with Fusion 2.0 vibrating dildo bundle.

Strap-on sex isn’t all about the receiver’s pleasure. As well as the myriad physical & psychological pleasurable facets of strap-on fucking your partner, you can now upgrade the experience further with a BumpHer. These ingenious additions to the base of the strap-on dildo are made from silicone, are available in a variety of colours and features curves that contour the clitoris providing sensual stimulation to the wearer during strap-on sex.

Mutual vaginal stim

Double Dildos

I always found the old, long ‘n straight double-ended dildos tricky to use when I had sex with women. Thankfully, easier and more stimulating options have been designed for mutual internal stimulation since those days.

The ‘double dildos’ created by lesbian sex shop Wet For Her are designed with an egg-shape worn vaginally, while a curved, rounded-tip dido then protrudes for use with your lover. You can use the Wet For Her Union Vibe 2.0 Double Dildo as a static dildo or as a vibrating dual stim toy, with a wireless remote control included.

These bestselling double dildos have received hundreds of positive reviews from customers – buy yours today from Wet For Her.

Scissoring Vibrators

If you and your partner love scissoring, you can add a stimulating buzz to the action with one of these clever scissoring vibrators.

I think these remote control sex toys are a brilliant idea if you’re a fan of scissoring or keen to get started.

The Wet For Her RockHer Mini Scissoring Vibrator is available as either a single item or the duo, as pictured. They are remote control, so you can simply get them into position, enjoy the erotic scissoring action with your partner, and control the vibes wirelessly.

The RockHer Scissoring Vibrators are made from medical-grade silicone, they’re rechargeable, and you can even use them in the shower together. Buy yours from Wet For Her and ramp up the excitement during your scissoring sessions!

Erogenous zone stim

Nipple Clamps

Nipples contain hundreds of nerve endings, making them a hot spot for teasing (or cruel, if you prefer) sexual stimulation. Nipple clamps can be worn during passionate play with your lover, and many different types are available to choose from.

I recommend an adjustable pinch style, like these NS Novelties Bound Adjustable Feather Nipple Clamps from SheVibe. They’re not only adjustable, they’re also pleasing to the eye, and the feathers can be used to tease and arouse while in situ, or as a separate sensory play toy.

There are plenty of other styles of adjustable nipple clamps at SheVibe to choose from, why not have a browse and see which ones suit you and your partner the most.

Finger-Worn Vibrators

For vibrating stimulation applied anywhere on your or your partner’s body during sex, without any need for interruption, a finger-worn vibrator is perfect.

These handy toys feel like an extension of your own body, and can be used during erotic massage to induce delicate flutters of sensation, or during sex to evoke a powerful climax.
Use on the breasts, nipples, vulva/labia or directly on the clitoris with a touch as light or intense as you desire.

A great choice is this Screaming O FINGO Silicone Fingertip Bullet Vibrator from SheVibe. It’s available in various colours, multifunction and waterproof. It’s a great price too!

Accessories

Position Aids

Sex position aids such as cushions and wedges can help you avoid post-sex cramps and joint pains, by making it easier and more comfortable to stay in your optimum position while enjoying erotic intimate play with your lover.

The leading name in sex position aids is Liberator, and I have a few of their fantastic products myself. Click to read all our Liberator reviews.

There’s a great selection of Liberator sex furniture at SheVibe, or from Lovehoney.co.uk if you’re shopping from the United Kingdom.

Water-Based Lube

Of course, whatever type of lube you use is entirely your choice, but I find water-based lube the most comfortable type for me personally, whether for clitoral or vaginal stimulation.

Due to the sensitive pH balance of the vagina, it’s best to seek out a water-based lube which doesn’t contain sugar-type ingredients – such as popular inclusion, glycerine.

The best vagina-friendly lubricants I have ever used are:

• YES WB Water-Based Lubricant
• Sliquid Organics Natural Sensation Lubricant
• System JO For Women Agapé Water Based Lube

Wet for Her stock a great selection of vagina-friendly lubricants, including the Sliquid range.  SheVibe is a great place to shop for Yes Organics lubes, as well as the System JO lubricants collection.

Get the low-down before you buy with my guide to Yes lubes, all our Sliquid reviews and System JO lube reviews.

Clitoral Arousal Gels

The clitoris has the most nerve endings than any other part of the body – over 8,000 in total! No wonder stimulating this small but important area is the easiest route to orgasm for many. Sex with your partner can be further enhanced by applying a clitoral arousal gel prior to playtime.

Wet For Her stock a selection of clitoral – and nipple – arousal gels, ranging from gentle arousal to intense. The Intimate Earth Intense Clitoral Arousal Serum is easy to apply before play – which will be worry-free as this serum is Paraben, Menthol, DEA and Glycerine-free.

These clitoral arousal products are brilliant for masturbation or partnered play, enhancing clitoral sensation & making resulting orgasms even more powerful.

Get kinky with:

Bondage restraints

If the idea of a little power exchange play with your partner turns you on, the easiest way to start is with some bondage restraints. Many bondage kits exist for you to choose from, I an array of materials, colours and designs. No matter if you prefer the traditional plain black leather cuffs, hyper-feminine floral and lace decorated, or somewhere in between – there’s a bondage kit to suit you and your lover.

Kits are a fantastic way to get started because they provide everything you need for an easy kinky play session: restraints such as wrist and ankle cuffs, a spanking implement such as a paddle or flogger, and usually a blindfold to restrict your partner’s vision and heighten the anticipation & stimulation felt – and the excitement for you both.

Pictured is the Loving Joy Bound to Play 11-piece Bondage Kit in purple. It includes everything you need for an erotic kink session, including handcuffs, ankle cuffs, breathable ball gag, collar, leash, blindfold, whip, rope, feather tickler and a pair of nipple clamps. It’s also brilliant value at under £40!

Remote-control love eggs

An alternate or additional way to enjoy taking control of your partner’s sexual pleasure is with a remote-control, internally worn vibrator. Often these are too loud to use discreetly in a public place (unless you’re in the back row of the cinema during a doubly explosive action film), but they are intensely arousing fun to incorporate in the bedroom – or even around the house.

A swish, modern, body-safe and technologically advanced choice is the Vedo Kiwi Rechargeable Remote Control Egg Vibrator from SheVibe.

It is available in an array of attractive colours, is rechargeable, waterproof and has a wireless remote for easy self-stimulation or to control the vibes felt by your partner -whether you decide to play in or out of the bedroom.

Recommended LGBTQ+ Sex Shops

Clonezone

Clonezone is THE gay sex shop. It was actually the FIRST gay superstore in the UK and Europe! The friendly experts at Clonezone have been providing Londoners – and now gay lovers worldwide, in this digital age – with top quality gay sex toys, supplies and advice since 1982. Loud and proud members of & allies to the entire LGBTQIA+ community, Clonezone are regularly found sponsoring and supporting local and national fundraising & awareness activism events.

Wet For Her

Wet For Her is THE sex shop for lesbians. It’s run by lesbians, for lesbians – stocking sex toys lesbians actually want to use and then enjoy using! Founded in 2009 specifically for the lesbian & queer community, it is now proud to provide a positive space for anyone identifies as lesbian, bisexual, queer cis, trans, or nonbinary.

SheVibe

Based in the USA but shipping worldwide, SheVibe is a happy, sex-positive store well-stocked with everything you might want or need. The team proudly buck trends with their spectacular comic book heroes style graphics, presenting an energetic vibe which you can feel lifting and empowering you as you shop around the website. SheVibe is always at the forefront of supportive projects in the adult industry, clear allies of the LGBTQIA+ community and full of pride and respect for its members and other allies.

SheVibe was founded in 2006 as a  safe space for women and femmes to shop. Now, their staff and client base are proudly diverse, widening their pleasure focus to become an inclusive place for absolutely every adult to shop.

 

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