Welcome to my Fifty Shades of Grey Drive Me Crazy Glass Massage Wand review! The Fifty Shades of Grey phenomenon (as that is what it has escalated into) has just got bigger. Who could have guessed it, but there are now actual real and official Fifty Shades of Grey sex toys. Yes really.
 |
 |
Related: Read all our Fifty Shades of Grey reviews
50 Shades Sex Toys
Set to be the marmite of the sex toy world, your view of them will largely be coloured by your opinion of the Fifty Shades of Grey books. I would say the majority of people who would love items from this range have either read and loved 50 Shades, or they have a friend, lover or partner who adores the adventures of Ms Ana Steele and the dastardly Christian Grey.
Upon seeing the collection I do like the style and design of them. The 50 Shades books were (eventually) very enjoyable. I was impressed that EL James has succeeded where so many failed beforehand (whether due to the writing or lack of publicity), not only bringing kink to the masses but making it acceptable. Not only acceptable but even accessible with your weekly grocery shop. Why, even a granny is reading 50 Shades in the latest ASDA Christmas TV advert!
Packaging
Perhaps it is the writer in me but I like the classy presentation boxes of the collection as well as the typewriter-style font. Thought has gone into the items packaging to make them ideal gifts and even those who know nothing of the 50 Shades ‘culture’ will appreciate receiving these beautifully wrapped and carefully created items.
I was recently sent various products from the 50 Shades of Grey Official Sex Toys Collection, free of charge, in exchange for my fair and honest review. What follows is my review for the Fifty Shades of Grey Drive Me Crazy Glass Massage Wand.
50 Shades Glass Dildo Review
The Fifty Shades of Grey Glass Massage Wand is a curved dildo for her pleasure. In clear borosilicate glass that will not break or shatter, one end serves as a handle with a duo of bulbous goodness and the other features a rounded teardrop shaped ‘tip’. You could of course use the wand whichever way round you wished. It could also be used vaginally or anally – making this item usable by men too, although perhaps not the main market for this piece.
The dildo is 7.5 inches long but you need to leave an inch to hold on to… so say 6-7 inches insertable. The dildo is curved I am guessing for attempted G-Spot stimulation but for me personally it wasn’t quite curved enough for this – maybe my body, maybe not – but I class this as a standard dildo not specially for G-Spot stim.
The handle side (let’s call it this for sake of argument) has the Fifty Shades of Grey logo marked upon it, to set this wand apart from any other glass wand you may already have. Let us say perhaps… a Tracey Cox Glass Dildo. After all, this range was made by the same people.
My point is, this glass dildo is almost exactly like any number of other glass dildos already available on the market. At under £30, it is not overly expensive and around what one would expect to pay for a glass static sex toy. However, the mileage from this product definitely comes from the 50 Shades branding and packaging.
What You Get In The Box
Each item in the range features a famous quote from the books, to add to that Fifty Shades atmosphere. The Glass Wand boasts the label in the title, ‘Drive Me Crazy‘.
As well as the glass dildo, sorry, wand, you also get a little instruction leaflet and a Fifty Shades storage bag in light and dark shades of grey satin with the Fifty Shades branding upon it. The bag has a drawstring top and minimises the clank and clatter of your glass dildo when you put it in a box or drawer with other items/sex toys. The bag is oddly reminiscent of a purple sex toys storage bag I’ve seen somewhere with a certain heart design… almost like it’s been made in the same factory!
The storage bag is on the thin side so it doesn’t entirely eliminate any noise from banging it around, nor will it offer substantial padding during travel or the like. The glass dildo does not require protection however, as it is made from strong and durable borosilicate glass as already stated, meaning it will not break even if dropped.
During Use
The wand also has raised nodules up the centre of the ‘shaft’ area, adding to the stimulation felt during use. These rub against you inside as you move it in and out, giving you added pleasure.
As this product is made of glass, you can use your lube of choice with it, whether that is water based lubricant, silicone, oil, hybrid or other. You can also cool down the glass wand in cold water or placing it in the fridge for a few hours first (top tip: remove before inviting family round) or warm up in some warm water for a cosy winter night in.
It should be obvious but… do not use straight from a freezer and do not place in boiling water then use. There’s kinky then there’s seriously dangerous.
Within the outer case you will find a black lidded box marked with Fifty Shades of Grey. Within this box nestles the wand, in a plastic moulding.
Summary
The basic premise of this product is a good one: glass dildo branded with the popular Fifty Shades of Grey design. However I would have some recommendations for the next batch, if only budget allowed for it.
Firstly, get rid of the thin satin storage bag and replace with a thicker, velvet storage bag with the Fifty Shades logo embroidered upon it. No, not hand stitched by grannies, they have machines that can do this now. This will add a feeling of luxury to what could be a truly beautiful item.
Secondly, the plastic moulding within the lidded box. Feels cheap to have an otherwise well presented toy just stuck into a plastic moulding when someone has already had to open two boxes to reveal it. I would prefer it to be either set in a black board insert or at least have a velour covered moulding which is tactile.
Thirdly the lidded box could be black plastic with silver coloured logo as the embellishment if manufacturers wanted to go all out. Not really necessary but cardboard is a little cheap. However I guess it is environmentally friendly… so my point is really all about the aesthetics.
How It Felt
I didn’t feel overly kinky when using the Fifty Shades Glass Wand – I felt like I was using a glass dildo, in fact any glass dildo I could have already had in my collection. As I have quite a few glass toys already this one didn’t exactly make me bite my lip in ecstasy (sorry) as something new and dazzling, but it will no doubt be loved by someone who hasn’t tried glass sex toys before (Hello? What are you thinking! Get some glass NOW) and/or those who are 50 Shades addicts.
Related: Are glass sex toys safe to use internally?
Perfectly timed for Christmas and of course Valentine’s Day 2013 I can see that the 50 Shades of Grey sex toys are set to be at the top of many a lady’s sexy gifts wish-list this year and these products will cradle the base of many a Christmas tree on Christmas morning.
In summary, for 50 Shades fans this is the perfect sex toy. You’ll adore it. If you want something a little more thrilling in terms of a glass sex toy, then perhaps move along to the Icicles Tentacle or Rose Dildo, as this is more of a classic style.
Buy Yours
For under £30 the Fifty Shades of Grey Glass Massage Wand provides a reliable glass sex toy that will be loved by all but the Fifty Shades haters, or those who already have a stash of glass dildos rattling in their bedside cabinet.
Buy your Fifty Shades of Grey Drive Me Crazy Glass Massage Wand through the following links, with discreet packaging and fast delivery.
|
|
Related: Read all our Fifty Shades of Grey reviews
Contains affiliate links
