Dominant Women Who Love Sucking Cock
By Zak Jane Keir
Do Dominant women love sucking cock? Would a dominant woman ever suck her partner’s cock? It doesn’t seem to fit the best-known dynamics of femdom, after all: the male slave/sub of many fantasy and widely-acknowledged scenarios exists to serve his Mistress in mostly not-particularly erotic ways, such as housework, errand-running and being beaten for sins both real and invented on the spot.
I’m a dominant woman and sometimes I like to suck cock. It’s not an inherently submissive act (and forget the type of mandom who thinks that there’s no such thing as a dominant woman reeeeeally because all them females Worship The Cock and only pretend to be dominant for money because what they really want is a Real Man, blah blah and bleargh! They can just go fuck themselves because nobody else wants to.)
Sucking off your submissive can be an amazing, delicious, mindblowing powertrip. Of course dominance doesn’t HAVE to contain any sexual, actual-genital-contact, intimate stuff at all: there’s no One True Way, but sometimes doing the unexpected and unusual in the context of a scene can boost it to a totally different level. Sometimes, what’s happening between Mistress and slave has an undeniable erotic chemistry that can’t be entirely ignored.
If you have someone tied up and blindfolded and not knowing what you might be about to do next, mixing painful stuff with carnal sensuality can intensify both sets of sensations. Will the next thing be a spiked wheel, a stroke of the whip, a kiss that turns into a bite, or will it be something else? When you’re the dominant one and you take the most sensitive part of the sub’s body into your mouth (where, don’t forget, you probably* have a full set of nice, sharp teeth) you can create a wonderful headfucking cocktail of lust, uncertainty, joy and fear. The soft, twining tongue and affectionate suction might turn cruel in a variety of ways, of which withdrawing your lips just seconds before your partner reaches orgasm is only one. For some submissive het men, the extra layer of transgression of a different set of rules is another intensifier – this is my Mistress, doing me orally! That’s not allowed, is it? What will happen to me if I come in her mouth? She’s put a gag on me so I can’t even tell her that I’m going to lose control completely!
Playing with edging and orgasm control is fun anyway, and when you have a man’s cock in your mouth you can feel – and be, if he’s not a bully or a selfish moron – in control of what happens; you can usually sense in a very intimate way that he’s really close to coming, and decide whether or not you’re going to allow it.
Of course it’s not compulsory to include cocksucking in a femdom session. Of course there’s often (and probably more usually) a dynamic where the sub only gets any kind of gratification when he’s home alone and reliving the scene he enacted with her, and she may reserve her fuck-and-suck activities for another partner. But if you have a sub you find sufficiently desirable to want to add a little direct sex play to your interactions, don’t be put off by irrelevant beliefs about custom and protocol. Because anything that happens in any BDSM session that works for both partners rather than being inflicted on one by the other with no appreciation of the sub’s needs, feelings, fears or limits, is perfectly OK whether hypothetical other people would enjoy it or not.
(*Not everyone has all their own teeth and that’s no particular barrier to being sexy or sexual. I’ve heard it said that being entirely toothless makes you a purveyor of phenomenal blowjobs, though it’s not something I intend to emulate till I’m about 100.)
– Zak Jane Keir
About the writer: Zak Jane Keir describes herself as a maker of stuff, writer of rude words, drinker of much cider, feminist, deviant, atheist, book junkie and morris dancer.
Please click to read Zak’s blog, follow Zak on Twitter and buy her erotic books on Amazon. You can also find out more about Zak in her Erotic Author Spotlight feature here at Cara Sutra.
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I’ve never had a desire to suck cock, so I haven’t; but if I ever felt like doing it, and there was a suitable cock within range I would. I can see that though most folk, or at least most men, in the scene see it as a ‘submissive’ act as it it involves ‘penetration’. But to me the person actively in control is the one doing the sucking. (Unless it is being done under some kind of pressure or threat – which I’d hope we’d never have anything to do with.) Depending on the people involved, the circumstances, the fellator may bring a man off in seconds, or create an exhausting roller-coaster tease of a ride lasting what seems like an hour. So I see it as neither intrinsically dominant or submissive, it can be whatever you both want it to be, so enjoy! (I do!)
I really love the idea of taking many people’s preconceived notions of what dominance is or isn’t and weaving that into a scene. Playing with someone’s mind has so much more potential than ascribing by commonly held tropes.