Zak Jane Keir
Most people with more than a passing interest in erotic entertainment know, these days, that there’s more to kink than what a former employer of mine used to request by way of cover art – ‘Leather, rubber, tits, arse, whip!’
By Zak Jane Keir: Oh holy shit, my feet! Just have to start by saying that, because it’s the thought running most regularly through my head today. A kind friend passed on a pair of beautiful 40-hole black Doc Martens to me as they were, apparently surplus to her requirements. She said they had hardly been worn, and she was absolutely right. They had hardly been worn at all.
By Zak Jane Keir Of course, it’s Easter, which is the Christian festival most associated with ‘fertility rituals’ and symbols that are not really that Christian at all – though there is still no agreement, let alone any proof, as to which specific ancient pagan feast inspired the annual celebration of eggs, bunnies, flowers and binging on chocolate. I wish you all joy and delight in the springtime, whether your bunnies are battery-powered or the sort that moan with joy when you wrap them up in rope, and if you want to mark the occasion by eating a Creme Egg off your favourite playmate’s naughty bits then go right ahead.
Absolute submission vs safe, sane & sensible BDSM We can’t even blame 50 Shades for the idea of ‘absolute’ submission, because it’s been around for at least 30 years. And, while Anastasia Steele might be a vacant fumbletrumpet who appears to have reached adulthood without even knowing what an email is, she does dump Creepy Christian more than once and even answers back from time to time.
If your cover is writhing with bared sweaty genitalia or is called something like Fuck My Anus Dirty Boy then most niche-but-not-specifically-sex-based gigs will freak out and reject you. And while you might get some major publicity out of showcasing your sexual awakening tale entitled I Love My Pussy at the local cat show, you’d have to have a thicker skin than me and no day job you’d mind losing, to think it worth a go.
By Zak Jane Keir: Do Dominant women love sucking cock? Would a dominant woman ever suck her partner’s cock? It doesn’t seem to fit the best-known dynamics of femdom, after all: the male slave/sub of many fantasy and widely-acknowledged scenarios exists to serve his Mistress in mostly not-particularly erotic ways, such as housework, errand-running and being beaten for sins both real and invented on the spot.
By Zak Jane Keir: How to review a fetish club: Having spent about 20 years of my life reviewing fetish and swingers’ clubs, I feel entitled to call myself an expert on the subject. It’s one of those jobs that may not have made me wealthy but has provided me with any amount of fun and good times (including the most magnificent blag of my entire career – a trip to Hedo II which made a change from the usual wet Wednesdays in Leeds or Dagenham).
Mostly, sex gets defined as something that men do to women rather than something women and men enjoy together. A lot of sex-related advice to women still seems to have a starting point of sexual pleasure being something women ration out to men: we bargain with it, treat it as a kind of currency. It might not always be so crude as ‘wait till you’ve got his ring on your finger before you let him finger your ring’ nowadays, but so-called ‘sexperts’ are still raking it in by advising women to withhold sex, no matter how horny they are, as a way of manipulating men into giving them something (other than multiple orgasms) that they actually want.
The cultural tsunami that is 50 Shades may be partly responsible for the idea that all BDSM is about women’s longing for the ultimate Billionaire Bastard to tie them up and do terrible things to them but that trope’s been a bit of a problem for a while. In my own younger days, and early explorations of the fetish scene, kink was all about ‘Miss Whiplash’ and clubs were called things like Maitresse, Madame Venus and Domina.