Zak Jane Keir

Plenty of kinky people, particularly those who grew up inside religious frameworks that treated their bodies as suspect, find enormous erotic charge in the symbols, roles and taboos those systems taught them to revere. Corrupt the incorruptible, defile the sacred, turn the confessional into a scene: this is well-worn territory. It's also territory that gets more attention twice a year, around Easter and Christmas, when the calendar itself pushes religious imagery into the foreground and the transgression of using it sexually feels a bit sharper than usual.

If you're drawn to the "no limits" fantasy in yourself, ask what specifically you're trying to get out of it. Sometimes the answer is that you want to feel deeply submissive and don't yet have the vocabulary for it, which is a solvable problem. Sometimes the answer is that you want to stop having to make decisions, which is a different problem and one no scene will fix. Sometimes it's that you want the drama of being seen as extreme, which is worth interrogating on its own before you put it in front of another person.

If he starts thanking you profusely, or bucking his hips, or in any way behaving as though he's been handed a treat, that's your cue to stop, reframe, and possibly punish. The point Zak makes about withdrawing your lips seconds before he comes is the sharp end of this. Edging as a Dominant act works because the sub cannot request it, cannot control it, and cannot predict when the next chance arrives, if it arrives at all.