BDSM Articles

My BDSM articles are here to give you the low down on everything kink-related. The world of bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, and sadism and masochism is enormous. There are just so many kinks, fetishes, interests and D/s orientations of the consenting adults involved.

BDSM newbies tend to have their curiosity piqued by something that arouses their kinky interest in the media, such as a bondage scene in an erotic book or movie, or bondage sex toys advertised on TV. Perhaps you’re in a relationship with someone who is already ‘into’ BDSM and you’d like to try it too, or maybe it’s a new interest both of you have decided you’re ready to explore. My beginners to bondage features are very popular, and I’ve written plenty about spanking and general BDSM safety advice too.

From time to time I get specific questions from readers whether they’re BDSM beginners or veteran kinksters. I answer these honestly and as thoroughly as I can based on my own experiences and research, within various BDSM advice features. As I’m trying to provide a comprehensive guide to BDSM here on the Cara Sutra sex blog, I will often tackle a specific kink or fetish in its own dedicated post, such as forced orgasms, watersports & piss play, and the adult baby fetish.

If there is an area of BDSM that I haven’t covered here, or if you have a specific kink-related question you’d like answered in full here on the blog (can be anonymous), then please get in touch and I’ll do my best to help. I hope you enjoy reading all my BDSM articles.

Why Do We Fetishize Strap-On Sex? Here’s The Top 10 Reasons

The fact that many people do fetishize strap-on sex, and insist that for them, it's a kinky act, isn't wrong or offensive to me. Pointing out the many reasons why this may be the case, what may have contributed to this conclusion that strap-on sex is necessarily kinky, doesn't mean I disagree that it is. For submissive men who love the idea or reality of strap-on sex, the truth is that it is kinky – and therein lies much of the enjoyment.

How To Enjoy Submission And BDSM In Everyday Life

For many people, submission and BDSM can only ever be enjoyed as part of a pre-arranged session. The fun might be even more restricted for others – only accessed via the internet. Some people, however, enjoy submission and BDSM on a 24/7 basis. What about you? Can you imagine ever including submission and BDSM in your everyday life? 

No Going Back

He was helpless. There was no going back.

Forced Orgasms – The Flip Side Of Chastity

I love the freedom to touch myself whenever I want –and I make the most of that freedom, as you can see by the thousands of sex toy reviews and erotic articles here on the blog. Chastity is definitely not for me, when I'm the one locked up I mean. How about the flip side of chastity: forced orgasms? There's still the element of external control -but rather than orgasm denial, I would be (consensually, of course) forced to orgasm over and over.

How Do You Get Your Partner To Dominate You?

How do you get your partner to dominate you? Unless your kink is likely to trigger some past trauma in your partner, just ask. Seriously! That's not bad advice because if you don't ask, you will never, ever get. (It does help if you ask right, but we'll get to that.)

Fetish Friday: Fucking the submissive male

This week I offer for your deviant delectation a FemDom fantasy written by one of My slaves... I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. - Cara Sutra  "Well you can't say you...

Living As A Slave To My Ex, The Bitch

There was light. To some extent I took it for granted, but the fact that light from the small window, high on the wall of the cellar that was my home, should penetrate the blanket that covered my cage, would, by many, have been regarded as unusual and welcome.

A Domme’s Fantasy: Your Submission

By Cara Sutra: Sometimes I wonder what it would be like if you were completely submissive to me. My mind tends to stray towards a sexual kinky fantasy - a Domme's fantasy. They're not talked about much, right? Usually all eyes are on the submissive - the submissive male, in the majority of FemDom - but what does a Domme dream about?

Safe Words And Traffic Lights: How To Say Stop In BDSM

During your explorations of the BDSM world, you may have come across the terms safewords and traffic lights. What are BDSM safe words, and what do traffic lights have to do with the exciting world of power exchange, kink and fetish?  
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Shouty Dominants: Kinky or Abusive?

By Cara Sutra: Are shouty Dominants kinky or abusive? When you think of shouting in a the usual sense, you will probably experience certain visualisations. A couple mid-row. A parent chastising a child. Maybe you recall a personal, perhaps painful, memory.

International Male Chastity Day | International Chastity Day Info

As a proud kinkster and huge fan of the chastity fetish in particular, it gives me great pleasure to share details of an official annual celebration of this highly erotic kink. International Male Chastity Day (also known as International Chastity Day) is celebrated on the 15th February* each year.

Daddy Doms and Little Girls

This moved me to tears - I hope it goes some way to explain this truly beautiful D/s relationship. I've long been fascinated by Daddy Doms and little girls.
Understanding Adult Babies And The Adult Baby Fetish

Adult Baby Fetish 101 | Complete Guide To Adult Babies & ABDL

Cards on the table: this is not my kink. Is it yours? As someone with an interest in another area of ageplay, I imagine that the adult baby fetish is viewed as extremely niche and is often misunderstood. Perhaps feared a little –even within the BDSM sphere.
Submitting to a Mistress Fetish Friday Article slave christina Cara Sutra

Submitting to a Mistress

By slave christina: This is my story of submitting to a Mistress. Sometimes you meet someone and there is an instant attraction. Other times you may take some time to find a level of happiness. Other times it is the situation you are both in that brings you together and sometimes it is the situation that keeps you together or forces you apart.

Sploshing: In Celebration Of The Wet And Messy Fetish

By Cara Sutra: Sploshing. Say sploshing to most people on the street and they won’t know what you’re on about (they'll also give you a wide berth for randomly talking in their face). Sploshing in puddles? Get your wellies on and go for a run through the muddy woods after a good downpour? Erm, nope.

Big Guide To Bondage Sex Toys, & Our Bondage Sex Toy Reviews

What can you use to restrain someone (or enjoy being restrained) in bondage? That's where bondage sex toys and bondage accessories come into their own. It helps having some background knowledge of just what's available in terms of bondage equipment, and why it's important to use items specifically designed for bondage rather than any old belt, strap or rope you happen to have around the house.

The Time I Made Him Make Me Safe Out

It hurts SO much. Is this all I can take? Would someone else be able to take more? Am I being a wuss? I want him to be proud of me. It hurts. Fuck, that hurts so much. Ok I am going to say red. Any minute now…

FemDom: The BDSM Scene Outsider?

FemDom is the Marmite of the BDSM world. Female Domination usually elicits a response firmly on one end of the scale or the other: yes please! or ...um, no thanks. While female submission has been warmly embraced by the masses, with sexualised imagery of restrained women now prevalent even in mainstream music and film media, FemDom is still viewed as extremely niche.  

Am I Submissive? Let’s Talk About Female Submission

For me, female submission is an entirely sexual act, not a lifestyle choice or a facet of my personality. I submit to my partner for my pleasure, as well as for his. The act of him taking pleasure in my sexual submission or bedroom role-play keys into an underlying vanity. That's why I say I'm a secret female submissive... for his enjoyment only.

London Fuck Doll: Fucked, Denied, Satisfied

I moaned aloud as he took me by the shoulders and drove the full length of his cock deep into my achingly hungry pussy. My slippery, soft labia were spread apart as they massaged his welcome penetration. My head turned to the side, flat on the bed as he pinned it there with his heavy hand in my hair, he rammed his cock into me repeatedly, frenziedly. This wasn't love-making. This was primitive, carnal rutting.