Is Noisy Sex the Best Sex? Not Always
There are ‘noisy sex’ jokes made on TV shows all the time. If the bed posts are knocking against the wall in the next room it’s a sign there’s some damn good sex going on. Throw a few ‘oh my GOD!’s and ‘yes, yes YESSS’es in there and yeah, we get the point. Someone’s getting it, and they’re getting it good.
People go to hotels so they can shed their audible inhibitions – it doesn’t matter if your neighbours in the next room hear, it’s not like you know them. Then you can have really good sex. You know. The noisy type.
Is noisy sex always the best sex though? Today I’m challenging that assumption. After all, I’ve had some fucking amazing sex which has been (almost) silent.
There are those times when you’re sharing a house with people and you need to have really quiet sex to avoid shame-face the next morning. Particularly if the other people in the house are family members, and especially if they are your parents [cringe].
What about when you’ve got paper thin walls and your kid’s asleep (you hope) in the room directly next to yours?
Maybe you’re a bit more adventurous and you’ve slipped off together at a party, and you’re getting some in the bathroom. Perhaps the bathroom isn’t in a house at all but is somewhere rather more public – a pub or club…?
Being forced to have sex quietly makes sex unbelievably hot. It’s all the passion of a quickie with some noise bondage thrown in. When you’re put in physical bondage the instant desire is to struggle against it, and the same goes for noise bondage. When I’m forced to have sex quietly all I want to do is explode with all the moans, whimpers, groans and cries I’m having to hold inside.
It becomes a competition, almost – who will break first? Who won’t be able to resist letting a little noise slip out because the sensations are simply too overwhelming? What happens when I firmly take him in my grasp and run my hand up and down his hot, hard shaft… like that? And what happens when I duck down and flick my tongue between her labia and find her clit… like this?
The challenge of keeping silent is a frustration, but frustration can be so damn sexy. Challenging your partner’s frustrations and teasing them mercilessly in the moment can also be fucking hot. Looking into each others’ eyes right at that moment, when you both don’t really want to get caught, but the threat of it is immediate and very real… it’s thrilling. It’s a quickie with all the usual intensity and passion but ramped up to another level entirely.
Being caught having sex – by anyone – whether it’s just being overheard ‘doing it’ or actually walked in on having sex somewhere you shouldn’t… it’s a hot and illicit fantasy for many. Sex is such a private, intimate affair for a lot of people (excluding exhibitionists & performers, and all power to you *fistbump*) which is why the threat of being exposed doing the act is so taboo. Because we, as adult humans, seem programmed to challenge our boundaries, it’s only natural that when we’re told certain activities lie beyond a ‘taboo’ line in the sand, they become all the more appealing.
Take the following situations.
“Don’t go into that room.”
You’re immediately intrigued about what could be in there.
“You can press any button except that one.”
Guess which button you feel an instant compulsion to press?
“Don’t Google image search ‘felching video‘ ”
See what I mean?
The implication that you can’t or shouldn’t make any noise during what is such an intensely passionate act just makes you want to scream even louder for the pure release from frustration.
I’m not saying noisy sex is totally rubbish. Screechingly loud banging sessions can also be OMG-sexy. I’m just saying not to underestimate the hotness of quiet sex. Let’s face it, if you’re in a situation where you need to be quiet but you desperate want to get it on, you might as well make the most of the enforced silence.
What do you think? Have you had any super hot but silent sex? How passionate was it compared to the noisiest sex you’ve ever had?
PS. On a slightly different note: I realised this morning just how fucking sexy it is when a guy cuddles me when he’s fully clothed and I’m naked. Especially if he’s wearing a suit.
Just me? Maybe just me.