Portland is Dildos – Oregon Powerlines Under Dildo Deluge

15 July, 2015

Portland is Dildos

That ‘fit’ woman from Cirencester who crashed her car while masturbating with a rabbit vibrator certainly pushed some reader buttons. It’s currently up to 287 views on Plag** and has brought in traffic from Hawaii, India, The Philippines and *GASP* North Korea (HOW?).

Never one to ignore the vox pop, this blog is written in homage to those of you who love a good shocking story focused around rude things. I give you todays sex in the news story:

Dildos Dangle From Portland Power Lines

How gorgeously alliterative is that headline? It’s true, vigilante sex toy wielders are tossing their rubber willies over power lines around Portland, Oregon. The orange and white realistic dildos are cropping up all over Twitter as residents and tourists alike offer up-to-the-minute dildo news throughout the city.

#PortlandisDildos was uploaded to YouTube and since then, more and more plastic penis has been spotted around the city. The Portland Office of Neighborhood Involvement is fielding reports and complaints about the sex toys but have yet to act to remove them. A spokesman for public utility Portland General Electric told Yahoo! News that she did not believe the rubber products posed a fire hazard.

This week the dildos have been reaching fever pitch, with an unprecedented number appearing on power lines throughout the city. Are these tributes left to broken toys? Is there a vigilante sexy superhero trying to raise public awareness about the joys of fake cock? Does it really matter? The #KeepPortlandWeird news is utterly jokes and social media is responding on form:

Way to go Portland you've made my day once again. Dildos on power lines. Priceless pic.twitter.com/ekutySlCay

— aidan (@aidanaid_) July 12, 2015

Throwing dildos over the power lines has become a thing in portland. #keeportlandweird They're all over town. pic.twitter.com/FIc1COao27

— rabble (@rabble) June 27, 2015

Someone threw dildos on power lines in Portland and the person being interviewed on the news goes "it's hilarious but seems expensive" 😂😂

— alexa_flatner (@alexaflatner) July 15, 2015

Whatever the reason for the mysterious dildo power lines saga, we’re eagerly waiting for the brains behind the outfit to come forward to explain why they’re literally dicking Portland. Was it expensive? What are they trying to achieve? Do they have a dong sponsor? Is this technically littering if the peen doesn’t hit the ground?