Telling Your Partner About Your Deepest Desires
Almost everyone has a kink they don’t tell anyone about. Well, there’s no need to be repressed in this day and age.
Nearly everyone has a sexual fantasy or fetish that they are nervous revealing to a partner. It may be a pretty tame, run of the mill kink or a fetish that’s a bit eye opening, it simply doesn’t matter. Often, we’re so worried about pleasing our partner in the bedroom that we often push our own desires aside. Well, that’s just not fair! A big part of a good sex life is being able to communicate effectively, so there’s no reason why you shouldn’t be able to tell your partner about your fantasy – no matter how dirty it is.
You’re really not alone
Part of the shame around sexual fantasies comes from the fact that people think that it is weird or rare to have one. In reality, this couldn’t be further from the truth. According to a recent study, the average person has 44 sexual fantasies. Not exactly a small amount! So there’s no need to worry about your partner thinking that you are odd or strange, when your ‘controversial’ fantasy may be a lot more common than you think. In fact, they might have a few fantasies of their own. Which brings us on to our next point…
Talk to your partner
If you don’t talk to your partner about your fantasies, how do you know that they won’t share them? Your fantasy may be a little more extreme than the kind of sex you are currently having but there’s no way of knowing without trying. Gently broaching the subject with them is part of a normal, healthy relationship. If they want to go ahead and try something out, start off small (the latex bodysuit might be for another occasion). In turn, encourage them to share their own fantasies with you. By doing this, you’ll learn a lot about their and your own desires – you may even discover a new kink in the process!
What kind of kink do you have?
There are a huge number of fantasies out there, ranging from pretty standard ones like being spanked and tied up to more complex, elaborate and outlandish ones. These can include the kind of scenes seen in the book Fifty Shades of Grey, where bondage is taken to a whole new level. Or perhaps you crave a little role play, where you and your partner act out a detailed scenario that ends in some of the best sex you’ve ever had. Ever popular ones include doctors and nurses, teacher and pupil and even dominant and submissive role play, where one of you completely surrenders themselves to the other. In fact, 30-60% of women fantasied about submission. Naughty girls!
Statistically, men have more fantasies than women – but that doesn’t mean that it’s a solely male phenomenon. If you could read people’s minds, you would discover all kinds of things. Additionally, when you’re struggling with whether you should tell your partner about your fantasy or not, you may wish you could read their mind! There’s nothing to worry about though. Tell your partner that you won’t act on it if they aren’t happy. That way, you can move on if they aren’t into it, without any embarrassment. If you get the green light though, you’ll certainly be celebrating all the way to the bedroom!
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About the author: Selina is Mayfair Escort with one of the most successful escort agencies in the capital – 247 London Escorts. She believes that no one should be ashamed of their sexual fantasy, and thinks it is important to remind people just how common some sexual fantasies are!