This week’s sex blogger in the spotlight is Evie the Rabbit, who writes honestly and openly on her blog about her sexual fantasies and experiences. For a slice of real sex from a sex positive woman and a whole lot more, you need to visit and bookmark this blog.
Check out her tag cloud if you don’t believe me.
See. Hop over and visit Evie the Rabbit once you’ve read her revealing spotlight and Q&A below.
– Cara Sutra
Evie the Rabbit is my online alter ego, the persona that I let loose occasionally when I get tired of being proper and well-behaved. The blog was begun from a place of frustration with my romantic/sexual history and the future that I saw for myself. I started writing and reflecting and then I started pushing myself to explore the things that I have always wanted to do but was too afraid to do, for whatever reason. In the year since I started this blog, I have started exploring kink and have begun to seriously engage in polyamory, as well as finally letting loose my inner slut. In 2013-2014, I’ve gone through what I call “my slut evolution“, having more partners in one summer than I had had in the previous six years, throwing a sex party, engaging in threesomes, taking a stranger’s virginity.
I am a slut. I am a feminist, bisexual, cis-gendered woman. I believe in engaging in ethical relationships, in open and honest communication, in not being a dick. My core values are compassion, community and social justice. I write because there should be less shame around sexuality. Because sometimes I scare myself with my desire for promiscuity and this culturally ingrained reaction against sluttiness is not okay. Because personal growth and development is crucial to leading a full life, and we should push ourselves to be our authentic selves, even when it’s painful. Because by writing, I hold myself accountable for my actions; if I’m ashamed to write about something on my blog, then I should not have done that thing.
I am curious and intrigued in the unknown; I want to try everything once.
Approximately how long have you been sex blogging?
I’ve been blogging for a little over a year now. For a long time before beginning this blog, I’ve thought about sex blogging. My personal journal for the last few years has been almost exclusively concerned with my sexscapades, and I wanted to share my experiences with a larger audience – a little mental exhibition, if you will.
What’s your favourite thing about blogging?
First of all, I love connecting with other sex bloggers and with readers who are going through similar things. There is a sad lack of sex positive people out there. The more I meet, the lovelier the world is. I’ve gotten feedback from a couple of readers who feel isolated in their own worlds, who don’t have sex positive or kinky or polyamorous friends, and the only similar people they can find are on the other side of the world. I feel privileged to be part of this community.
Secondly, blogging forces me to pause and analyze and reflect on my experiences. I have been having a lot of experiences lately, and writing afterwards has become a routine part of my self-care. It allows me to identify what I liked, what I didn’t like, why I reacted the way I did, what I was feeling, etc. And it allows me to relive my experiences, drawing them out so that they’re not just a quick moment in time.
Do your friends know you’re a sex blogger?
There are several different groups of friends who know about my sex blogging. First and foremost, my non-sexual/non-romantic friends know about it. Then my partners read it. And finally, some more casual lovers have found and read my blog.
When sharing with friends, I’ve had an interesting mix of reactions. At first, I was very timid about talking with them about it. I know that I’m a little bit of a freak, and internally, I still do a lot of self-slut shaming, so I expect to receive the same from them. Some of them have been incredibly supportive. One or two have been a little weird about it, expressing discomfort or shock. But even then, it’s allowed me to have interesting conversations with them, and I’ve been slowly successful in spreading the message of sex positivity.
Sharing my blog with partners (whom I write about) is a risky proposition. On the one hand, I am able to share with them all the feelings and thoughts that I feel less comfortable sharing in person. On the other hand, if I am struggling with something or am going through a breakup with them, knowing that they are reading it limits my ability to be completely honest. So I have been learning to be honest yet circumspect. 🙂
I also have a bad habit of announcing that I’m a sex blogger to mere acquaintances or to lovers that I’m not sure of yet – I just like the social cachet of being a sex blogger. This has resulted in uncomfortable situations, where lovers have found my blog. It’s fortunate that I try to be honest without being bitchy; however, it does limit me in those moments when I really, really would like to be bitchy.
Will you still be blogging in 5 years time?
Personal growth and development are very important to me. If I ever reach a point in my life where I’m no longer pushing myself to grow…that would be a death of the soul. So yes, I intend to still be blogging in 5 years time. Sex, relationships, love, dating – these are areas with limitless opportunities for personal growth.
Tell us about three other bloggers you admire, and why.
They rarely tout the benefits of lingerie for your own pleasure. Self confidence? Sure – “buy our sexy knickers and feel good about yourself!” sounds like a positive ad message, but I’ve never seen anyone say “buy our sexy knickers and enjoy rubbing yourself wet through the silky gusset!” – I’m available for consultancy, though.
Girl Seule – wry, self-deprecating, self-destructive in the very best way, and funny. Plus, she’s my name twin. In a recent post, “From Scotland with Love“, she writes about an encounter with another wedding guest:
My naked body tends to be a lot more repelling than seducing so it seemed like a viable, humiliating possibility.
He got out of bed, looked around the room a bit and then said,
“I can’t find my other sock.”
Spankalicious – real, reflective, brave and funny. She doesn’t hold back. In the post “Gas Bottom Up Up and Away“, she confronts a gassy coworker (yes, these are the things she sometimes writes about) who turns out to be a racist:
She farts. Loudly. Often.
At first it used to be after 4pm when most of our co-workers had gone home. Now she’s expanding her trumpet zone.
What is on your sexual bucket list?
• MMMF sex: By far, this is my top fantasy. When I watch porn, it is almost always three guys fucking a woman. I love anal sex, and I love sexual objectification, so this is my penultimate experience.
• Sex while being watched by strangers: I am a Nervous Nellie when it comes to publicly revealing my sluttiness. As a result, being watched while having sex really pushes my so-uncomfortable-it’s-hot button.
• Going to a swingers’ club and servicing an innumerable number of gentleman: I sometimes get into revved up slut mode, where I just want to be used by unknown people. Head Swirl had a post about a “blow job assembly line” – ever since then, I’ve wanted the same experience.
• Being blindfolded and used by an unknown man: Mmm…this is a nice fantasy. The “stranger” aspect of it really gets me hot, plus, add in the uncertainty of who the man was (“could it be this man that I am now meeting? what about that man over there?”) – oh, lovely!
• Give a blow job in a public place: On a bus, under a table at a restaurant, at a movie theater…
• Have sex in a library: Does this need to be explained further? Books = hot. Sex = hot. Books + Sex = Explogasm.
• Have sex in an elevator
• Do a 1950s household scene
– Evie the Rabbit