Difficult times – the bastard that is cancer
I can’t quite explain how difficult things are right now, for all concerned. Difficult times indeed.
My partner’s father (my father in law, kinda) has been diagnosed as not only terminal with cancer, but with only a few short months left before the end. He and his wife are residing with us at present so that we can help in whatever ways required and to care for them both at this extraordinarily difficult time.
He is only mid-fifties and it is horrendously heart wrenching to see him weaken day by day, once a strong man now facing such a time yet with that stubborn resolve and determination that seems to be a genetic trait passed down through the generations.
Sitting my baby son Blue with him I just want to cry, knowing he will never see him walk and never hear him talking. Yesterday he picked up a guitar while I sat with Blue next to him, and he burst into song. ‘Sloop John B’ was his chosen song; those who were in the room at the time were fighting back tears.
He remains steadfastly jovial in the meantime, pragmatic and courageous. Apologetic to all concerned for the ‘trouble’ he is putting us through, immediately quenched by us, of course. It’s all so horrendously devastating and upsetting.
We will be doing all we can to make the time he has left the best ever. A party arranged, trying to tick off everything on the bucket list. It isn’t enough, it never will be – but it’s all we can do.
I am absolutely shattered from the events of the last week or so – but what is that really, in comparison? Everything is so insignificant compared.
Nothing else to say really – just that if there are delays on blog updates, you know why.