Can you be a kinky parent?

The couple have made their way to the bedroom, after the night out. He flips the light on, and giggling they collapse on the bed. The babysitter has been paid, the 3 kids are duly fast asleep and no doubt dreaming of innocent adventures.

He leans over and tugs at the zip keeping her dress on as she bends down to free her poor feet from the torturous new heels she’s been dancing in this evening, her long legs the envy of the men in the bar. But she is his to have tonight, and always.

“Hey!” she admonishes, playfully.

“What?!” he retorts, trying and failing to hide the lecherous grin on his face.

She finally flings off her shoes and turns, bringing with her the furry cuffs from under the bed. Those cuffs. The ones for extra fun sex.

“Just wanted to get my shoes off before we start,” she replies, innocently.

“Are we keeping the light on too?” The hope in his voice is unmistakable.

“Sure – I’m feeling pretty dirty.”

 

*** *** *** ***

Pretty tame for a sex scene, I suppose you’re thinking. Furry cuffs? Light on? Hardly Story of O, is it.

But you know, this couple have KIDS. Don’t you know, apparently children mean you shouldn’t even be thinking anything kinky in the slightest. I mean being a parent – parents barely even have sex at all, never mind interesting sex.

Isn’t that right, people?

Would you have thought the introduction above completely illicit if he had freed the under bed restraints, placed her in a collar with leash, affixed nipple clamps and then removed the remote controlled butt plug she’d been wearing for him all evening?

How about if she affectionately handled his package through his trousers upon their entry into the bedroom, only for her hand to find the familiar comfort of his CB-6000, the key hidden on a long chain round her neck, nestling between her breasts? Him falling to his knees to kiss and lick her soles, begging to pleasure her in any way she deems fit?

Would this behaviour, in the privacy of their own bedroom, deem them unfit parents, immoral people, unfit for the realms of normal society just because their sexual preferences are perhaps unconventional and not yet accepted as part of ‘normal, fun sex’?

I just happen to prefer this to the atrocity of furry cuffs…

Please think these questions over before asking me whether I am going to be ‘giving up the kinkiness’ or ‘quit being a Domme’ now that I am having a baby. Do other people quit having a sex life? Perhaps they stop masturbating as it’s a ‘filthy habit’? No?

Then why should kink or a personal fetish be any different. What I do when my children are well looked after, and I am in the privacy of my own bedroom (or in fact any adult environment that is safely away from children) does not have any impact or bearing on my status as parent, nor does it make me a terrible mother.

I am proud of who I am and my varied personal choices and preferences in the bedroom, as well as my interesting personality. I am also aware of my responsibilities and act accordingly, safely, sensibly and with my family and kids at the top of the list of priorities.

You can be a parent AND be kinky. They are not contradictory.

Just like I think you can still be a parent and go and have a wank sometimes.

Think about it.

 

 

 

11 COMMENTS

  1. I agree whole heartedly. I have 3 kids have participated in an open relationship and we are dancing on the edges of mild bondage. Do our kids see us, no. They do see us kiss and flirt as we pass each other with a pat on the butt or a pinch here or there. They know that we enjoy being together and laugh with each other a lot. What they see outside of our bedrooms carries far more weight then what we do inside they may walk in on at some point in time. If and when that happens a small explanation is usually sufficient, such as not being hurt or playing. I have even told one we were wrestling period. He accepted it and went on, as long as no one was really being hurt hurt.

  2. Couldnt have put it better myself!! As a stay at home mum I spend all day cleaning up after my dirty little children, their faces, their nappies, their clothes, their bedrooms, my tables, floors and sofas etc etc the list is endless. So once those little monsters are safely tucked up in bed upstairs and out of the way It’s my turn and I’m as dirty as I possibly can be without waking them up with the noise hehe..

  3. I cant believe people think sex stops when you have kids, obviously the worry what if they walk in, but you are still you and you both need to keep sex fun despite having kids.
    So well said huny.
    xxx

  4. I certainly believe you can have children and be kinky. I am sure that happy kinky / sexual when the kids are asleep parents are certainly better for the children than unhappy couples who have no time for each other.
    Just looking over my twitter TL, most my kinky friends have children, maybe it is because of the similarity in their circumstances we have become friends.
    Yes, it is more difficult, being bound when a child wakes up is not ideal but so long as the kink is contained and locked away during waking hours there is no diffenrence to any other sexually active parents.
    As a thought, I sometimes wonder how parents who co-habit or share a ‘family bed’ end up pregnant at all :/
    Lily xxx

  5. Congrats on the baby! 😀

    And I agree! Just because your going be a parent doesn’t stop the fact that your going to have sex while the kid is asleep 😀

    Love the blog by the way 😀

    Shell xx

  6. IF you are both .. be very careful

    Google Children that witness abuse. and before you say its not abuse.. IT WILL be to a child. To those that will say other wise pleas to read up on early child hood development

    • Can you be a parent that has sex? Obviously. Do these parents do that in front of their children? Of course not!

      Just the same with kink. Why are people so quick to assume it’s witnessed by the children? Noone assumes vanilla couples are shagging on the dining room table with the kids gathered round. Why is kink different?

      OBVIOUSLY not in front of the kids. Shouldn’t even have to be said.

    • I witnessed more damaging things through my childhood that have had a lasting effect on me even NOW, through being brought up in a religious home. I only WISH my parents had been in the scene. At least those in the BDSM scene have a code of conduct and morals to follow.

  7. Totally could not agree more . In the bed room away from the kids it’s our playtime too right and kinky as hell. Crazy isn’t it as kids,were created by this same procesyet parents,are supposed to not mention it society norms really bother me.

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