What I Want From You: From Me To Him
By Cara Sutra
I’m not sure how to word this – to explain to you what it is that I want from you, what I need. Things that uncover some needs deep inside me, that I’m not even sure why they exist, but I know they do. Reading other’s experiences and desires, lusts and satisfactions I feel kindred spirits at work – a meeting of ..well, not minds, but sexuality.
I find myself wanting you strict, harsh, unforgiving, I want your hand in my hair, tangled round and pulling hard, to put me where you want and when you want. Hand round my neck, hard, cut off my air entirely, make me writhe and whimper for the air that I need. That you deign to give. I want punishment and discipline. And firm controls, boundaries, consequences. A tangible sense of Domination within life itself, at the very core of living together every minute, Master and slut, You and kitten. For me to be this thing, this object that you not only use and abuse but mould to your every desire and whim, utterly own and control, that I am afraid to upset, displease, disobey.
But this requires regular, constant maintenance. I worry that this is too much for you. That it isn’t for you You’re loving but in a different way. You can be loving but in this way too, but do you want to? Physical punishment with spankings, floggings, collared and bound to the bed to sleep, chained at your feet to sleep, forced to go through humiliations and experiences to teach me lessons, to punish, pain for the moulding of my mind to your ways, to break me down into a malleable thing you can mould.
Is this possible? I am not sure but I hope so…