L’Amourose Paramour Pleasure Partners Set Classique
Pleasure Panel review by Carnal Queen
If anybody has ever ventured onto my own blog, they’ll know how highly I regard L’Amourose. They make two of my favourite ever toys (Rosa Rouge & Prism VII Rouge) and as a company in general, I think their products rock. I was super excited to be given the opportunity to review a L’Amourose product, as part of Cara’s Pleasure Panel, because this set has intrigued me for a long time. It’s L’Amourose, it was going to be awesome … wasn’t it?
Without further ado, let me introduce to you all, the L’Amourose Paramour Pleasure Partners Set Classique – The first every L’Amourose product that I don’t really like! *sad face*
I’ll admit, I’ve procrastinated over writing this review. I love being able to write positive reviews, and introduce people to fabulous toys, I even enjoy writing negative ones, because highlighting a toys negative elements can help people make informed decisions on what’s right for them. I’m not a huge fan of writing reviews for mediocre products though, because there’s nothing to sink my teeth into, on a positive or negative level. Mediocre is a good word for the L’Amourose Paramour Pleasure Partners Set Classique in my opinion, at best it’s ‘ok’, but that’s not going to rock anybody’s world, is it?
The concept is brilliant – A remote controlled set, with an egg shaped bullet vibrator, that can be inserted into any one of it’s three silicone cradles, MAE, LANA or CLARK, thereby creating a new toy and a new experience. As you’d expect, the L’Amourose Paramour Pleasure Partners Set Classique is made to the L’Amourose high standard, and it’s presented in a really lovely way. So why am I not digging it?
The Remote Control & Bullet Vibrator
The remote control itself is quite ingenious, because it doubles up as the charger for the bullet vibrator. On one side, you have your touch-sensitive control pad, on the other, a connection to sit your bullet on when it’s time to charge it, fab. The bullet itself can be controlled via the on-board button, but this only gives you access to the five modes – However, using the remote gives you the same five modes, but also the ability to set the speed to one of twelves options, and also to record your own ten-second custom pattern.
There’s also 2 touch modes, which basically means, the faster you move your finger around the touch pad, the greater the vibration intensity, and the slower you move it, the lesser the intensity. In theory, this feature sounds quite good, but we’ve found it to be pretty unresponsive, it just can’t keep up with your finger movements.
You really do need to read the book to understand how the remote control actually works, it’s not very intuitive in my opinion, but when you’ve got an understanding of how it operates, and practiced ‘stroking’ the pad to adjust the speed, it generally works well in the normal modes.
The instructions mention you being able to pair it to a Bluetooth enabled device instead of the remote control, in order to control the bullet – we have no idea what this is about, because you can’t. None of our Bluetooth phones or tablets can see the L’Amourose bullet when they search, and even if they could, you’d need some kind of interface to be able to take control, like an app. Maybe it’s a feature L’Amourose are going to implement in the future, but for now, it seems to be there just to cause confusion in your instruction manual!
Now for the important part – the vibrations! This is where I start to cry into my tissue and daydream about how good the L’Amourose Paramour Pleasure Partners Set Classique *could* have been. I was so disappointed. L’Amourose make some incredibly rumbly toys, and whilst I wasn’t expecting Rosa type depth from a bullet so small, I wasn’t expecting buzzy, surface level offerings either. We know rumbly can be packed into bullets by some companies, but sadly L’Amourose haven’t managed to get anywhere near with this. Admittedly, the vibrations do feel slightly better when they’re put into a silicone cradle, but it’s not enough for me.
CLARK Silicone Cradle
CLARK is the cradle that will turn your angry wasp bullet into a vibrating cock ring. The cradles themselves are lovely, and so beautifully made, there’s no annoying seams or ragged bits anywhere. I adore the soft turquoise colour of my set too, it’s gorgeous. However, the CLARK has very little stretch to it, so if you’re looking for a really stretchy ring that will fit even the most girthy of cocks, this ain’t gonna be it! CK found this really uncomfortable to put on and wear, so testing was rather limited. I can tell you though, it wouldn’t work for me even if he was happy to wear it for a full session. The egg shape naturally touches my body along the middle of the shape (where the AR logo is), and it tapers off along the top and bottom, like a Rugby ball. It doesn’t hit my clit, it’s not high enough, and for me to feel anything, CK needs to grind into me to get any contact. News flash, it’s hard ABS plastic, and this fucking hurts. Sorry CLARK, you didn’t turn into a superhero for me.
MAE Love Egg Silicone Cradle
As with all of the silicone cradles, the egg shaped bullet is very easy to push into the MAE cradle, and it stays nestled inside the soft silicone. Once inside me, the MAE kind of vanishes. Not literally, obviously, but I can’t feel it’s there at all, until it vibrates. If I try to get it off standby with the remote once it’s in position, sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t. It really isn’t brilliant at maintaining a working connection when it’s shielded by my body. This means it needs to be turned on, before I put it in, and it generally has to stay on that mode and speed, unless I get lucky and my remote decides to play ball. Ever tried shoving an angry wasp inside your vagina? No, me either, but I would imagine the MAE is as equally difficult, because it’s a bit lively! Sadly though, the vibrations do very little for me when it’s inside me, and the remote not working very well kind of kills the reason I enjoy using love eggs, which is for out-and-about teasing, at the hands of CK. MAE, I don’t think we’ll ever be friends.
LANA Couples Silicone Cradle
Much like CLARK, LANA is designed to stimulate the clitoris during penetration. The silicone arm goes inside the vagina (think we-vibe without the internal vibrations) and the bullet sits against the clit. Well it should, it sometimes might, if it decides to keep the fuck still! Honestly, LANA drives me nuts, because it wants to keep slipping down and moving around with every thrust. In a static pose, it’s barely in the right place for me, but when it’s playing silly beggars and moving around all over the place, it hasn’t got a hope in hell of giving me pleasure. CK can kind of force it to stay in the same area by thrusting deeply and then just grinding, but hello, same pain as with CLARK and no actual sexy goodness. LANA, I straight up don’t like you. You were a good idea in principle, but in reality, you suck.
I’m really really sad about the L’Amourose Paramour Pleasure Partners Set Classique. I wanted to love it, jeez I’d of settled with liking it, but the reality is, it just doesn’t work for me. The concept is brilliant, and if you prefer more gentle vibrations, or surface level stimulation, you might well like it, especially if your anatomy allows you to. But vibrations aside, I have issues with how this set works with our bodies, and that will never be overcome for us.
It’s a stunning set, and would make a really impressive gift because of how it’s presented, but sadly it’s style over substance. If you’ve never tried L’Amourose before, I’d strongly advise that you don’t start with the L’Amourose Paramour Pleasure Partners Set Classique, because I fear you’d be put off the brand completely. Even though I don’t like this, I still think L’Amourose rock. Buy a Prism instead and go enjoy yourself!
– Carnal Queen
Thanks to Pleasure Panel reviewer Carnal Queen for this guest review of the L’Amourose Paramour Pleasure Partners Set Classique (£149.99)