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Been Friendzoned? Why You Need To Ditch The Friendzone Myth

Been Friendzoned? Why You Need To Ditch The Friendzone Myth Heard of the friendzone? Perhaps you've been friendzoned, or friendzoned someone else. I've most heard the term amongst men, but a few women have referred to it as...

Trigger warnings on books will censor emotional responses in the great reading experience

A recent article in The Guardian reported that trigger warnings have been requested on works of literature, by students in the US. Not children; young adults or adults who are of an age to study classical works of literature that have adult interest and themes. The books in question include such greats as The Great Gatsby (for misogyny and violence), Huck Finn (for racism), Things Fall Apart (for colonialism and religious persecution), Mrs. Dalloway (for suicide), Shakespeare (for pretty much everything). Now, Gove has reputedly axed To Kill a Mockingbird and Of Mice and Men from the UK's English Literature GCSE syllabus. Personally, I studied Macbeth, Richard the Third and A Streetcar Named Desire for my English Literature A-Level. Pretty much all of the violence. It has been commented that such classic books have topics which may upset or provoke an uncomfortable response.

How do I find a Mistress or Domme? FemDom BDSM Advice

One of the main questions I come across as a BDSM Mistress is 'How do I find a Mistress or Domme?' but with messages like these, it should be obvious what not to say on your first (or any) message to a prospective Mistress or owner.

10 Myths About Bisexual People

Although bisexuality is slowly becoming more visible in the media landscape, and more respected as the distinct sexuality it is, so many myths about bisexual people remain prevalent.

Artificial hymens, faking your virginity and why all of this makes me sad

I have no idea why a woman would want to fake her virginity. Not for herself, not for any man, not for her family, not for society or culture. The only reason why she may be forced to is through fear, manipulation and other control mechanisms. A major control mechanism in modern society, stretching back through the ages, is religion. The thought that our eternal soul and future hinges on our behaviour in the here and now, that we should obey a set of rules as laid out in whichever man-made, bound together bunch of documents that best serves the needs of those ruling in society at any one time.

List of Shame: The 10 sex toys which need forcing into retirement

I know you all wonder about the dark side of my sex toy collection and for once I don't mean bondage restraints. The ones that sadly, didn't get (chucked) away. The toys which have brought me to tears of frustration. The toys which have made me grip the sheets harder as I bite back the venom which threatens to tumble forth as I search for the right button. The toys which have made me scream - in agony.

#MeToo

The #MeToo tag has taken over social media this week. This isn't some feel-good viral, however; quite the opposite. The prevalence of the #MeToo hashtag is a reflection of the prevalence of sexual harassment towards, violence against and the intimidation of women, by men.

Relationships And The Myth Of Unconditional Love

Recently I declined the offer of a guest article, not for the usual reasons that the writing quality wasn't great, or that it was simply meaningless, sales-motivated filler. The guest piece would have been entitled "Unconditional Love: A Key Ingredient To A Happy Relationship" - and I'm afraid I simply don't agree with that sentiment at all. In fact, I don't believe that unconditional love has a part in any romantic relationship. 

Newsflash Michigan: Anal Sex & Blowjobs Are Not The Same As Dog Fucking

Yep, because apparently Michigan USA need this pointing out. You'd think the differences between consensual human fuckery, in all it's beautiful and kinky forms, and fucking animals, which cannot be consensual, would be patently obvious to anyone. Apparently not in Michigan, where a bill is being put forwards (SB19) which could lead to the outlawing of not just sex with dogs & animals, but also consensual anal sex and oral sex between adult humans. Grouped together as one and the same motion.

Stealthing Is Actually Rape | A Message For Men Who Secretly Damage Condoms Or...

A disgusting sex practice has come to my attention in the past few days – and I’m not talking about whatever you can find in so-called weird porn. No, I mean properly disgusting. The practice known as stealthing. I’m so angry I can barely type.

Why I Don’t Like Smartphone App Controlled Sex Toys

I don’t like smartphone app controlled sex toys. There, I said it. Yes, I know they’re all technological and wondrous and I should probably be ecstatic about the advancements being made in the sex toy field.

Why The Women’s March 2017 Is Necessary And Relevant

By Cara Sutra: On January 21st 2017, 5 million women around the world marched as a form of protest. To be heard, to be listened to, to be respected. They marched for their lacking rights and for global equality. It wasn't only women marching either, there were persons of all genders and identities.

What Is A Sexpert? Lose The Sexpert Label And Get Real

By Cara Sutra: What is a sexpert? What makes someone a sexpert? Nothing, really. I could just as confidently announce that I am, in fact, Santa. There are no qualifications that lead to someone being titled an official ‘sexpert’ (notice how it’s usually in quotes, denoting something unofficial or for merely for creative merit).

Sex, lies, videotape and being a decent person

Now this is totally my own opinion here, but surely being a decent person dictates that you don’t show someone’s sexy goodies off to all and sundry, or even one other person, if you haven’t got explicit permission, excuse the pun. If you don’t have consent to share said pictures, video, whatever type of media it is - then don’t. It doesn’t even just apply to sexy selfies, sex tapes and naked photos - this is usual courteous practice when it comes to sharing an image that someone has taken which you’ve found on the internet. Could be of anything. A kitten, a flower, a bridge, a vibrator. Don’t just take it and share it on your blog - ask permission first. Or at least make sure consent to share/use it is apparent by it being labelled under Creative Commons licence. Same with snippets and excerpts of someone’s writing.

World Domination (And Protecting Myself From Hurt)

After asking today what I should blog about next, the first part of this blog post's title came about, for some mysterious reason. Well yes it might seem I've been on a bit of a world domination spree lately. Ok, not just lately I admit, it's in my blood, my nature, my character. I wasn't always this way. I used to be a doormat when I was younger, but times change us and any knocks or bad experiences just callous the heart and make us harder. I have had my share of those, more than my fair share, in fact.

No more page 3? Don’t worry, there are plenty more boobs in the world

It's more than a little scary that if wank fodder gets taken away from a certain type of man their first instinct is to have a tantrum, call names and insult women - insult their looks mostly, for what else do women have? So who is to 'blame' for the door closing on boobs in The Sun? Most put this squarely at the feet of 'those stupid feminists'. We can assume that this refers to the Say No To Page 3 campaigners (find on Twitter and Facebook), who have certainly not made a secret of their feelings about boobs on page 3 (or indeed any other page) of The Sun. Bare breasts in the paper has been labelled misogynistic, objectifying and primitive and the campaigners tirelessly petitioned to get this feature permanently removed from The Sun. Upon hearing the announcement on the 20th January, the Say No To Page 3 campaigners were absolutely ecstatic in their triumphant celebrations.

So, The Pipedream Fetish Fantasy Free Eyemask Is Totally Crap

So, The Pipedream Fetish Fantasy Free Eyemask Is Totally Crap A Stampy Pants Rant by Cara Sutra I have no idea why Pipedream Products go on about giving away a free eyemask so much on the packaging...

Classifying vaginal piercings as FGM is an unacceptable mutilation of women’s freedom

All my research beforehand had stated that this would be the case; a clit hood piercing can increase the sexual pleasure of a woman through either masturbation with or without sex toys or during sex with a partner. Throughout my years with a clit hood piercing the only slight issue I’ve had is the rattling of the metal if I use a bullet vibrator to stimulate my clitoris during masturbation. Everything else is sheer pleasure. There’s an illicit thrill attached to having my clit bar or ring slightly tugged or teased by a lover’s fingertips or tongue, or the motion of the ball-end against my clit during the thrusts of sexual intercourse. Knowing it’s there throughout the day, underneath my clothes, makes me feel sexy. Makes me feel more confident and attractive.
content theft from sex bloggers Cara Sutra

Avoiding accusations of content theft from bloggers

As there seems to be some mystery surrounding how to publish something from someone’s (my) blog without them (me) being annoyed about it and shouting 'content theft!', I thought I'd write about how anyone can put my content on their site and be assured I will have a smiley face, not that frowny-faced ‘take it down immediately or imma DMCA your ass’ look quite a few companies have left me with lately.

Stampy Pants Rants: Stop making people scared to talk about being sex positive

I would like to see the guilt of an entire group of people not used any more. Not taken advantage of. It's manipulative, it's emotionally blackmailing, it's controlling and it's definitely not positive.