You wouldn’t put up with non-waterproof underwear would you? That’s not even going inside your body (well ok, not unless you’re getting kinky here -ahem-) and you still want to change your undies daily and WASH THEM in the washing machine. I don’t imagine you ‘lightly spritz’ the gusset and leave it to dry, nor do you give the gusset a light clean with a wet wipe before tucking it back in the drawer. Or at least, I hope you don’t. Stay away from me. Official Stampy Pants RantSo why the fuck do we put up with non-waterproof internal vibrators?
By Cara Sutra: Shocked. Devastated. Emotionally drained. Physically wiped-out. Like many other people, I’m feeling the effects of a particularly grim year. We’ve lost so many creative, courageous and inspiring people from the world of media and the arts. The world barely has time to move on from one catastrophic happening before another tragedy, natural or man-made, strikes, bringing death but also terror and fear-inspired divisions among those left alive.
Working in the sex industry, I've recently heard the term orgasm gap a number of times in blog posts, on social media and in press emails to me. What is this orgasm gap? Why is the spotlight on it now? And why do I believe there are dangers associated with it?
By Cara Sutra: I mean if porn DVDs are being produced which are expressing an enjoyable and liberated view of sexuality, then there should be no problem having Video on Demand following the same guidelines. This has become known as the UK porn ban.
Raised traffic due to partial or total nudity does not equal good blogging in my opinion, it equals more free porn on the internet. Of course free pornography will always get great traffic. It's free porn!
If a woman were telling you her rape story (and how sad it is that this is a common event, so common that I can phrase it as ‘her rape story’ as if all women must have one somewhere) would you respond with an angry, “well I’m not a rapist! How dare you share that story with me as if you’re blaming me for it!” No, I doubt you would. If you did, you’d be an asshole. Somehow though, from behind the chosen anonymity or at least semi-privacy of a keyboard, screen and internet, this type of response was deemed absolutely fine. Encouraged. As if all women were attacking all men, not sharing their utter and sheer sadness that even one man in the world acted horribly towards a woman and made her feel afraid for her mind, body or life.
I would like to see the guilt of an entire group of people not used any more. Not taken advantage of. It's manipulative, it's emotionally blackmailing, it's controlling and it's definitely not positive.
I know you all wonder about the dark side of my sex toy collection and for once I don't mean bondage restraints. The ones that sadly, didn't get (chucked) away. The toys which have brought me to tears of frustration. The toys which have made me grip the sheets harder as I bite back the venom which threatens to tumble forth as I search for the right button. The toys which have made me scream - in agony.
But apparently men have resented this day of love and romance. For now, on March 14th, there has come about Steak and Blow Job Day. I mean, really? That's what men want, is it? Recognition for being SO lovely on Valentine's Day, for deigning to even think in terms of romance, for valuing their relationship for a WHOLE day, that the month after, they need a steak dinner and a suck off session to recover?
By Cara Sutra: There's a particularly stomach-churning part of the internet which insists on foisting sexy roleplay on to others while completely bypassing the need for consent or even an ounce of interest from the other party. Without turning it into a gender war, this does majorly seem to be men viewing unsolicited sexy roleplay as a way to 'pull' women on the internet.
After asking today what I should blog about next, the first part of this blog post's title came about, for some mysterious reason. Well yes it might seem I've been on a bit of a world domination spree lately. Ok, not just lately I admit, it's in my blood, my nature, my character. I wasn't always this way. I used to be a doormat when I was younger, but times change us and any knocks or bad experiences just callous the heart and make us harder. I have had my share of those, more than my fair share, in fact.
By Cara Sutra: I don't have a kink for pretending to be a dog. I'm not even a 'dog person'. However, the national furore surrounding people who want to be a human puppy this week really made my hackles rise. The cause of the outrage? TV shows giving an insight into the puppy play scene and/or fetish, including a Channel 4 documentary entitled The Secret Life Of The Human Pups.
By Cara Sutra: Consensual Slut Project: I am proud to be a slut. That isn’t the same as saying I recognise that I am a woman of loose morals and I don’t care. What I mean is that I have an affinity with the phrase itself and its place and meaning in my life.
I most often hear 'feisty' used in an insulting way by men about women. To describe a woman whose ability to voice their opinions, and strength and openness in various areas of their life, makes the man somehow feel threatened and insecure. In this event it often leads to the use of this term in derision, scorn and complete condescension. A way of trying to to 'take her down a peg or two'.
By Cara Sutra: I'm not talking about the bed, although the subject of this post could also be a breeding ground. Real feel penetrable sex toys. Is it out of the question entirely for adult product manufacturers to make a non-porous real-feel sex toy?
FemDom is the Marmite of the BDSM world. Female Domination usually elicits a response firmly on one end of the scale or the other: yes please! or ...um, no thanks. While female submission has been warmly embraced by the masses, with sexualised imagery of restrained women now prevalent even in mainstream music and film media, FemDom is still viewed as extremely niche.