One of the main questions I come across as a BDSM Mistress is 'How do I find a Mistress or Domme?' but with messages like these, it should be obvious what not to say on your first (or any) message to a prospective Mistress or owner.
By Cara Sutra: Consensual Slut Project: I am proud to be a slut. That isn’t the same as saying I recognise that I am a woman of loose morals and I don’t care. What I mean is that I have an affinity with the phrase itself and its place and meaning in my life.
As a woman, I'm regularly dictated to about how I should look. The media tells me I shouldn't be bigger than a size 10, that I should have large breasts but somehow maintain a narrow waist, that my arse should be high and firm, small and round, and I should be the correct amount of tanned at all times.
By Cara Sutra: I don't have a kink for pretending to be a dog. I'm not even a 'dog person'. However, the national furore surrounding people who want to be a human puppy this week really made my hackles rise. The cause of the outrage? TV shows giving an insight into the puppy play scene and/or fetish, including a Channel 4 documentary entitled The Secret Life Of The Human Pups.
I don’t like smartphone app controlled sex toys. There, I said it. Yes, I know they’re all technological and wondrous and I should probably be ecstatic about the advancements being made in the sex toy field.
By Cara Sutra: Can the world please stop caring so damn much about what (supposedly) all men do? Or what all men think? And how, all these things that ALL MEN DO! Or ALL MEN THINK! are immediate and obvious signs that you, as a woman, are unattractive/unloved/neglected/totally shit in bed and should go and live under a rock with only a masturbatory twig for company?
Been Friendzoned? Why You Need To Ditch The Friendzone Myth Heard of the friendzone? Perhaps you've been friendzoned, or friendzoned someone else. I've most heard the term amongst men, but a few women have referred to it as...
Recently I declined the offer of a guest article, not for the usual reasons that the writing quality wasn't great, or that it was simply meaningless, sales-motivated filler. The guest piece would have been entitled "Unconditional Love: A Key Ingredient To A Happy Relationship" - and I'm afraid I simply don't agree with that sentiment at all. In fact, I don't believe that unconditional love has a part in any romantic relationship.
Working in the sex industry, I've recently heard the term orgasm gap a number of times in blog posts, on social media and in press emails to me. What is this orgasm gap? Why is the spotlight on it now? And why do I believe there are dangers associated with it?
By Cara Sutra: I'm not talking about the bed, although the subject of this post could also be a breeding ground. Real feel penetrable sex toys. Is it out of the question entirely for adult product manufacturers to make a non-porous real-feel sex toy?
I know you all wonder about the dark side of my sex toy collection and for once I don't mean bondage restraints. The ones that sadly, didn't get (chucked) away. The toys which have brought me to tears of frustration. The toys which have made me grip the sheets harder as I bite back the venom which threatens to tumble forth as I search for the right button. The toys which have made me scream - in agony.
A disgusting sex practice has come to my attention in the past few days – and I’m not talking about whatever you can find in so-called weird porn. No, I mean properly disgusting. The practice known as stealthing. I’m so angry I can barely type.
By Cara Sutra: I mean if porn DVDs are being produced which are expressing an enjoyable and liberated view of sexuality, then there should be no problem having Video on Demand following the same guidelines. This has become known as the UK porn ban.
Raised traffic due to partial or total nudity does not equal good blogging in my opinion, it equals more free porn on the internet. Of course free pornography will always get great traffic. It's free porn!
Yep, because apparently Michigan USA need this pointing out. You'd think the differences between consensual human fuckery, in all it's beautiful and kinky forms, and fucking animals, which cannot be consensual, would be patently obvious to anyone. Apparently not in Michigan, where a bill is being put forwards (SB19) which could lead to the outlawing of not just sex with dogs & animals, but also consensual anal sex and oral sex between adult humans. Grouped together as one and the same motion.
I most often hear 'feisty' used in an insulting way by men about women. To describe a woman whose ability to voice their opinions, and strength and openness in various areas of their life, makes the man somehow feel threatened and insecure. In this event it often leads to the use of this term in derision, scorn and complete condescension. A way of trying to to 'take her down a peg or two'.
Working in the adult industry I see my fair share of explicit photos. Dick pics: amateur and porn star. Naked breasts: pendulous to Parisienne. Spread vulva: hairless to hirsute. I follow blogs and social media where imagery from artistic nudes to hardcore porn are welcomed, celebrated and shared. So why do some explicit photos anger me so much? Well sometimes, explicit photos are a breach of consent.